I AM A FROG

I am a frog monster known as an Elroe Frog.

So far, I have no name.

After all, monsters with names are widely known and feared as “named monsters.”

I do not know if I shall ever become such a splendid being, but at present, I am simply a humble, nameless frog.

Elroe Frogs are one of the endemic species that inhabit this Great Elroe Labyrinth.

As such, we are quite rare.

That alone ought to show you how valuable I am.

Forgive me—perhaps that was too bold.

And yet I did not tell a lie.

Out of all the species that inhabit the Great Elroe Labyrinth, while the Elroe Frog may not be the weakest, we are most certainly close to the bottom.

Worse yet, because our skin glistens in all the colors of the rainbow, it can be used to create ornamental items.

Weak yet made of valuable materials.

You may have guessed where this is going.

Yes, we Elroe Frogs make highly attractive prey for adventurers to hunt.

And adventurers are not our only adversary.

There are many dangerous assailants among the other monsters that threaten our lives.

For indeed, we are weak.

Only a few chosen frogs can survive long in the Great Elroe Labyrinth, where strong monsters run rampant.

It is only thanks to our rapid rate of reproduction and our indiscriminately omnivorous eating habits (for we consume anything, even rocks) that we have managed not to go extinct.

However, in recent times, I have noticed an acceleration in the rate of the disappearance of my brethren around me.

Considering our weakness, it is inevitable that our numbers should ever dwindle, yet the nature of this is quite unusual.

I must investigate the cause immediately.

Hmm? How strange.

My body cannot move all of a sudden.

What in the world has happened?

Good heavens! Could this be one of the very spider webs I have heard rumors about?

Dear me, if I am trapped here much longer, I shall be devoured by the web’s creator.

Yet, struggle as I might, my body cannot free itself, and I sense something approaching close behind.

It seems that my life is already at its end.

Even as I turn to look, I see a single spider in the very act of sinking its fangs into my body.

…So yeah, wouldn’t it be hilarious if a frog was thinking something like that?

Ugh, they still taste gross, though.

THE WORLD-APPROVED THREAD

You know, something’s been bothering me lately.

Namely, the Appraisal results of my threads.

As the level of my Appraisal skill goes up, its explanations have gradually gotten longer.

In other words, each time it levels up, I get a more detailed description than before.

Before I entered the Middle Stratum, I honestly didn’t have any time to waste wondering about nonsense like that, and while I was in the Middle Stratum, I couldn’t produce thread at all to test it out.

But I was planning on Appraising my thread again once I got back to the Upper Stratum.

What wonderful description will it give for my thread now that Appraisal has evolved into Professor Wisdom?

I’m so curious!

And so, now that I’m back in the Upper Stratum, I can finally start my Thread Appraisal Party!

First, the default thread without any modifications.

Lemme see those results, Professor Wisdom!

<Spider Thread: A sticky thread produced by a spider-type monster. Primarily used to build webs or ensnare prey. If captured in this thread, escape would be quite difficult. The most effective means would be to burn it since the thread is weak to fire. Quality A>

Oooh, intriguing.

None of this information is really news to me, but I’ve never seen that quality thing at the end before.

“A” must mean it’s really good, right?

Sure enough, when I try deliberately producing thread of slightly lesser quality, it gets “Quality B.”

Since my thread skill level is far from maxed out, I can’t imagine A is the best rank. Still, that must mean it’s pretty good already, don’t you think?

Next, we’ll try some customized thread.

This is the kind I normally use, with the stickiness and durability cranked up to the max.

<Spider Thread: An extremely sticky and durable thread produced by a spider-type monster. Primarily used to build webs or ensnare prey. If captured in this thread, escape would be quite difficult. The most effective means would be to burn it since the thread is weak to fire. Quality A>

It added a little bit more text to the explanation, although the quality didn’t change.

Next, I guess I’ll try adding the Cutting attribute.

<Spider Thread (ATK+200): An extremely sticky and sharp thread produced by a spider-type monster. Primarily used to build webs or ensnare prey. If captured in this thread, escape would be quite difficult, and you would also get sliced up. The most effective means would be to burn it since the thread is weak to fire. Quality A>

Hmm? Now it’s got attack power?

In gaming terms, it’s almost like it’s turned into a piece of equipment or something. Is that what’s going on here?

So my thread is equipment, huh…?

Well, sure, I guess you could say it’s a weapon.

My main weapon, in fact.

I try adding the Impact and Shock attributes, too, and get more or less the same results.

Next, I go with adding resistances, which basically just tack on a little “high resistance to XYZ” bit to the default explanation.

The one big change was that when I add Fire Resistance, the “blah blah blah weak to fire” part changes to something like “It has moderate resistance to fire, so it would be difficult to burn it with a weak flame.”

So even with the resistance, you can still burn it up.

Man, what a bummer.

But anyway, next I’ll try getting rid of the stickiness.

Since that’s the biggest trait of spider thread, it’d basically just be normal thread at that point. So what will the Appraisal results say?

Oh, and I should improve the feel of the material, too.

<Spider Thread: An incredibly rare case of nonsticky thread produced by a spider-type monster. It has excellent resistance and magic power conduction, making it top-class thread material. However, since it can only be acquired if a spider monster deliberately produces it without stickiness, it’s incredibly difficult to find. Quality A>

Whoa, the explanation changed a whole bunch!

It doesn’t even follow the format of the default thread explanation anymore!

I mean, yeah, I figured making spider thread that’s not sticky would turn it into a whole other thing, but whoa.

Everything I’ve tried so far has just been the same basic explanation with a few words added here or there.

And now we get this huge change?

Wow, though. I guess thread without stickiness is a super-good material, huh?

It got a rave review in its Appraisal.

Wondering what the heck “magic power conduction” even means, I do a double Appraisal, and it basically means whether it’s easy or hard to imbue power from magic and skills into the material.

And with spider thread, it’s apparently really easy.

I guess that makes sense since you can customize the thread in the first place.

Maybe it holds up better to different treatments and stuff.

If you used it to make some kinda cloth armor, I bet it’d come out awesome.

Not that I have any plans to put clothes on this spider body of mine at this point.

Clothes would just make it harder to move, and most of all, it’d probably be next to impossible to get clothes off without ripping them.

Spider bodies have a much more complicated structure than human bodies, okay!

We can’t just pop an outfit on or off whenever we want!

I’ve got eight legs, for crying out loud!

Whew. Well, anyway, forget the part about clothes.

Basically, this is just proof that, from the perspective of the world at large, my thread is awesome.

Professor Wisdom said it, so it must be true.

I’m sure I’ll keep depending on this thread in the future, too.

THREADS AND ADVENTURERS

One day, a group of adventurers burned some taratect webs.

Then they cautiously ventured into the space where the webs had been.

“What the hell’s this?”

“White…balls? Is this thread?”

Before their eyes were countless white balls, scattered all over the ground.

On closer inspection, they appeared to be balls of fine thread.

While it is common knowledge among adventurers that the spider monsters known as taratects occasionally make nests out of webs, they had never heard any stories of balls of thread being found inside those nests.

The man who acted as their leader cautiously prodded one of the balls with his scabbard.

He assumed that if it was made of spider thread, the ball would have the same stickiness.

And yet it only felt soft and light under his scabbard, almost as if he were touching a ball of the highest quality cotton.

Not that a common adventurer like this man had ever touched high-quality cotton before.

Gingerly, the leader picked up one of the balls of thread.

It felt silky smooth, like the hair of a gorgeous woman.

Not that this unpopular man had much experience touching the hair of a woman, either, beautiful or otherwise.

It felt so pleasant to the touch that he found himself stroking it in a trance, forgetting that he was in the middle of a dangerous labyrinth.

Seeing this, one of the other members of the group was unable to resist diving into one of the piles of thread balls.

The gentle sensation cushioned his landing and enveloped his entire body.

It was like he was lying on a bed of clouds.

Not that he had ever slept on a bed of clouds, and such a thing would be physically impossible anyway, so that part was just a wild fantasy.

Giving in to their urges, the rest of the group dove into the piles as well.

For a while, they simply savored the blissful comfort. Then they collected all the balls of thread, as well as an object that appeared to be a wyrm egg, and brought it all back with them.

Wyrm eggs were incredibly rare and could be sold for a considerable fortune. But to these adventurers, it was nothing but an afterthought.

Evidently, a certain young wyrm was heard to indignantly exclaim, “That’s ridiculous!” when she heard as much many years later.

At any rate, thanks to this party of adventurers, the balls of thread were unleashed into the world.

The truth was, they had no intention of parting with the balls of thread at all.

That was how enthralled they were by the softness.

The merchant who managed to purchase them was exceedingly skilled at negotiation and had powerful foresight.

In addition to currency, he made a deal to use some of the balls of thread to create sleeping bags for each of the adventurers.

Thus, those lucky adventurers acquired a vast fortune as well as a very comfortable night’s sleep indeed.

FROGS

The first monster that I ever defeated in this labyrinth was a frog.

Since then, I’ve run into them countless times.

They’re pretty weak monsters by this labyrinth’s standards, but there sure are a lot of ’em.

Also, even though they’re really weak, they’re still a great deal stronger than I was early on.

Nope, doesn’t mean frogs are strong, just that Small Lesser Taratects are insanely weak.

Frogs are still weaker than most other monsters for sure.

But it’s not like they attack in groups, either.

They don’t survive with sheer numbers, like those centipedes that are always in a huge swarm or those buddy-buddy lizards that always move in groups of three.

They’re distributed all over the labyrinth, and every one of them does whatever they damn well please.

Although the Upper Stratum was lousy with frogs, I found ’em in the Lower and Middle Stratums, too.

The ones in the Lower Stratum have poison, so even though they’re weak, bigger monsters give ’em a pass.

There weren’t as many as in the Upper Stratum, but yeah, I still saw ’em around often enough.

I’m guessing the reason there were fewer down there is ’cause even with the poison, it doesn’t mean every monster is gonna let ’em live all the time.

My bet is that in the Lower Stratum, they don’t go out of their way to eat the frogs, but they’ll do it if they’re starving and no other food source is available.

And in the Middle Stratum, they evolved to adapt to their surroundings.

The Middle Stratum is this lovely magma-filled, red-hot lava zone.

And guess who was swimming around in the magma without a care in the world, with the ridiculously advanced skill Flame Nullification?

Yep, some goddamn frogs.

I mean, sure, there were other species from the Upper Stratum that had evolved and adapted to live in the Middle Stratum, too, so it’s not like the frogs were a special case.

But still, when I see a stupid frog with Flame Nullification—a skill I don’t even have, mind you—I can’t help but feel weirdly defeated, like they’ve beaten me to it or something.

I had plenty of life-or-death battles with frogs in the Upper Stratum, to the point where I kinda started thinking of them like my rivals.

Nowadays, I can slaughter ’em without breaking a sweat… And yet here they are with a skill I’m dying to get my hands on.

What’s up with this depressing feeling, huh?

But still, despite being total weaklings, these frogs have some tricks up their slimy little sleeves to help ’em squeak by.

In the labyrinth, it’s survival of the fittest.

If you’re weak, you’ll get killed and eaten by a strong monster in no time flat.

The poisonous ones in the Lower Stratum get overlooked to an extent, but they have another method of survival, too.

The main reason these weak frogs manage to multiply and survive all over the Upper Stratum is this: They’re omnivores.

They’ll eat literally anything, even inorganic matter.

They’ll even eat the labyrinth itself.

They have a skill called Acid Attack, which they’ve apparently used to develop miraculous powers of digestion.

They’ll eat whatever they can find lying around, up to and including whole boulders.

Does a rock really have any nutritional value? Yeah, I wondered the same thing at first. But if you start worrying about details like that, there’ll be no end to it, so you just gotta ignore that thought.

Since I’ve seen ’em eating boulders, they must provide some nutrients. Probably.

However, it seems like they’re not the frogs’ favorite dish since they’ll only eat rocks if they’re starving and there’s literally nothing else.

Still, that means they’ll never go hungry. Unlike me, who can only eat other monsters.

There’s boulders and rocks and stuff lying around all over the place, but they could even just chip a piece off the damn wall.

Which means that even if their population balloons way out of proportion, starving will never be a concern.

In other words, they can keep on reproducing without ever having to compete for food.

So they basically just keep multiplying, making sure that as many frogs as possible can survive, I guess.

What’s really weird to me is that even though they’re frogs, I get the feeling that they’re not born as tadpoles.

There aren’t really any bodies of water in the labyrinth, and I’ve never seen anything that even resembled a tadpole.

So are they just straight-up frogs from the second they’re born?

I guess they’re monsters from another world, separate creatures that just happen to resemble the species from Earth, so it’s not that weird if they don’t follow the same life cycle, but somehow that explanation doesn’t satisfy me.

And also, even though they don’t have a tadpole pre-evolution, they somehow have a frog evolution.

The frogs that I saw in the Lower Stratum were stupidly huge.

How huge, you ask? Like they might be able to swallow a whole snake in one bite.

There’s a saying about fattening frogs for snakes, but I’m pretty sure this frog fattened itself up so it could kick a snake’s butt.

It made me realize there are a lot of monsters that start out weak but can get really strong if they evolve a bunch. Just like my original species, the taratect.

That wimpy frog grew up so big and strong. I was actually moved!

But even that big frog is only average at best in the Lower Stratum’s power rankings.

It certainly could never run with the big dogs, like earth dragons and Mother.

In the end, it’s still just a frog, I’m sad to say.

I mean, there could be some even bigger, crazier frog that I just don’t know about, but that would probably only be in the Bottom Stratum, where I’ve never been.

I really doubt such a thing exists, though.

Anyway, I doubt anyone has this much expertise on the ecology of the Elroe Frog.

I only gained all this information by observing them in the Upper, Middle, and Lower Stratums, after all.

I’ve even done dissection experiments in the form of catching and eating them, so basically, the only thing that’s left that I don’t know about frogs is what they look like when they’re first born!

I guess the way to truly complete my collection of knowledge would be to investigate if there really are any frogs in the Bottom Stratum… No way in hell I’m going that far, though.

As it stands, I’ve more than earned the right to call myself a “Frog Master.”

So feel free to give me the Frog Master title anytime, okay, Ms. Divine Voice (Temp.)?

There’s no such thing, huh? Figures…

SUMMONING SOUNDS COOL, BUT…

So there’s a skill called Summoning.

As the name implies, it can bring something in from another place.

Specifically, that “something” is any living being that has formed a contract with the skill user.

Summoned beasts, you might say.

The Summoning skill itself is actually an evolution of a skill called Creature Training, which allows the user to command monsters and animals and the like.

So I guess it’s like a Monster Tamer changing classes to become a Summoner.

Either way, it’s a skill that lets you command monsters and make them fight.

So here’s what I’m thinking.

Aren’t there, like, tons of monsters ripe for the taming here in the Great Elroe Labyrinth?

Since it’s the biggest labyrinth in the world and all, it’s chock-full of monsters.

Now, I’ve never been outside of the labyrinth, so I’m just guessing here, but I’d be willing to bet that the population density of monsters is way higher in here than most places.

And if you could tame a bunch of those monsters, wouldn’t that be enough to make a whole monster army?

If there’s one thing I learned when I fought the fire wyrm, it’s that strength in numbers is pretty damn terrifying.

Take it from me ’cause I sure as hell learned the hard way.

In other words, quantity over quality.

When you get as strong as a dragon or something, those numbers might not mean as much. I think it’d still be more than enough to threaten anyone else, though.

Since I’ve been soloing my way through everything this whole time, I’d like to think I understand the limitations of fighting alone pretty darn well.

And as everyone knows, two heads are better than one.

If you have a partner to watch your back, you’re that much more likely to survive.

Plus, if they’re bound to you with a skill, you know they’re not gonna betray you.

Most of all, I’ve always liked those monster-raising sims.

I like any game that you can sink a ton of hours into, really.

But taming monsters and training them to fight sounds super-fun, doesn’t it?

If their level gets high enough, they’d probably evolve like me, so even if they start out weak, they could end up really strong if you raise them right.

Doesn’t that sound awesome?

Oh, but getting stronger than me isn’t allowed.

Eventually, I would wanna build a whole big monster army, but maybe I’d start out by focusing on raising a single monster.

Since I’m more of a magic user, it’d be good to get a monster that can tank damage on the front lines.

Yes, I once entertained such a delusion myself.

But when I looked at Professor Wisdom’s skill list, my grand aspirations crumbled into dust.

Because acquiring the Creature Training skill costs no less than ten thousand skill points!

Same for the Leadership skill that the fire wyrm had.

I guess that means I’m not a natural-born leader.

Fair enough. I’ve dedicated both my old life and my current one to the path of the loner.

Meaning I’ve barely even tried to interact with anyone else, let alone lead them.

So it’s no wonder I can’t get those skills.

Ah-ha-ha…

Ughhh.

So much for my plans to make frogs run errands for me and all that good stuff.

THE MENACE OF THE MIDDLE STRATUM

What’s the worst monster in the Middle Stratum?

The seahorses? Those small fry are all over the place.

Even though there are lots of them, they’re not too hard to beat as long as you take the right countermeasures.

No, they’re far from the worst.

The catfish, the evolution of the seahorse?

Being an evolved form and all, it certainly is a lot stronger.

But still, its basic strategies aren’t much different from the seahorse. Honestly, they’re basically the comic relief character of the Middle Stratum, so it’s hard to see ’em as a threat.

Nope, they’re still nowhere near the worst.

The eel, which I’m pretty sure is the next evolution after the catfish?

They’re pretty strong.

Again, their basic strategy is shooting fireballs from the magma, just like the seahorse. But in this case, since their stats are so damn high, they’re a serious threat.

They’re like a totally different beast from the seahorses or catfish, even though they’re doing the same thing.

It’s definitely a big step up in terms of strength in the Middle Stratum.

But still, if we’re talking strength alone, I’ve seen way scarier stuff in the Lower Stratum.

Like earth dragons, earth dragons, and more earth dragons!

When you think of things that way, it’s not quite intimidating enough to qualify as the worst.

The “worst” I’m talking about means something I just can’t beat.

And there’s definitely a monster that fits that description.

The monster I thought was the worst in the Middle Stratum is called the Elroe Piekhu.

It looks like a red dog, specifically an Akita.

Its big round eyes are actually pretty cute.

But its powers are nothing to sneeze at.

First of all, being a dog and all, it’s got a sharp sense of smell.

These things can sniff me out when I get too close, so I can’t get the jump on them.

And since I can’t use my threads in the Middle Stratum, an ambush is out of the question, too.

That makes them a really bad match for me.

But those are not the only reasons.

When these mutts spot an enemy, they self-immolate.

That’s right—these puppies are literally on fire.

Since I’m weak to fire, fighting a dog that’s basically a walking inferno is a big ask, to say the least.

In fact, it leaves Poison Synthesis as pretty much my only attack option.

My only shot at winning is to somehow douse them in spider venom.

I mean, I can’t touch them. Unless I wanna burn up and die.

If I were a dog lover, I might die of cuteness as well as acute burns.

And on top of all that, these things tend to travel in packs, I guess because they’re dogs or whatever.

The power of numbers is scary.

Can you imagine what a nightmare it’d be if multiple dogs charged at me when my only means of winning was poison?

I’d be dead meat, for real.

The only saving grace, if any, is that their stats aren’t particularly high.

Individually, they’re a lot weaker than a catfish.

So, usually, I can still manage somehow.

Hmm? If I can manage it, then how are they the worst?

Well, hold your horses. The “worst” monster that I’m talking about refers to a very specific individual among these dogs.

When it comes to this specimen, concepts like strength and weakness lose all meaning.

Whether you’re weak or strong, you’d never be able to beat this thing.

That’s the terrifying trap that awaits you.

“Awooo!”

Now do you understand?

Listen to this mournful, pitiful whine.

Look at the way those eyes are gazing at me.

It looks like it’d die if I gave it the tiniest push, yet I find myself hesitating.

That’s right. It’s a puppy.

What’s up with this ridiculous pet-like cuteness?!

Sure, the grown ones can be cute at times, but a puppy is obviously crossing the line!

You’re a monster, dammit!

And look at me—I’m a spooky, scary spider!

This is discrimination!

If I had to be reborn as a monster, I would’ve preferred to be this one!

Cuteness conquers all!

Get outta my face, stupid!

I mean…if I have to kill a cute little creature like this… Just the thought alone fills me with feelings of… Oh, nothing. Hmm.

Come to think of it, I guess I do have the “Merciless” title.

With the very weird effect of preventing me from feeling guilt.

I thought that sounded strange at the time. Who knew it would come in handy at a time like this?

See, it’s important to have countermeasures.

So would you be able to defeat the menace of the Middle Stratum?

“Awooo!”

MIDDLE STRATUM EXPLORATION REPORT

I am an adventurer.

I’ve been exploring the Great Elroe Labyrinth since I first started out, and now I can even roam around in here without a guide accompanying me.

I hate to brag, but I think I might be better acquainted with the Great Elroe Labyrinth than any other adventurer out there.

But the Great Elroe Labyrinth is enormous, and even I can get lost right away if I stray onto an unfamiliar path.

There’s no way around that, of course.

Even a veteran guide can’t memorize all of the routes through the labyrinth.

In fact, we still don’t have a full picture of the Great Elroe Labyrinth at all.

It’s divided into several strata, with the one we normally explore being the Upper Stratum. And this Upper Stratum is also the limit of human exploration.

While an entrance to the Middle Stratum has been discovered, it’s a hellish area boiling with magma.

It’s not the kind of environment where humans could possibly survive.

Even deeper than the Middle Stratum is the Lower Stratum, which can be reached by descending through a cavernous pit.

But few humans have ever gone down there and returned to tell the tale.

According to the small number of surviving witnesses, the Lower Stratum is crawling with tremendously strong monsters.

Rumor has it that there’s also a Bottom Stratum, where even more terrifying monsters dwell, but the truth of that is unknown.

Neither the Middle nor the Lower Stratum is a place where humans can tread.

We haven’t even completed the mapping of the Upper Stratum.

That just goes to show the enormity and terror of the Great Elroe Labyrinth.

If you’re wondering why I would explain all this, it’s because I’ve been recruited as a member of a Middle Stratum exploration team, of all things.

It’s under the orders of our kingdom, leaving a mere adventurer like myself no option to refuse.

I have no way of knowing why the kingdom would decide to undertake something as absurd as exploring the Middle Stratum.

Naturally, I objected to the exploration and explained the dangers of the Great Elroe Labyrinth at length. But they refused to listen, and I was forced to undertake the fool’s errand of exploring the Middle Stratum.

Our troop’s first order of business was to strengthen our Fire Resistance skill levels.

This makes perfect sense; it is a necessary skill to survive in the Middle Stratum for any length of time.

Then we packed plenty of water and rations into storage bags imbued with Spatial Magic, girded ourselves with heat-resistant gear, and set out as prepared as we possibly could be.

The other members of the exploration team were determined that we could surely conquer the Middle Stratum with all this preparation, but as someone with a great deal of familiarity with the labyrinth, I knew that we stood no chance of succeeding.

To make a long story short, the exploration ended in failure.

Perhaps you could call it a success in that we returned unharmed; however, the only information we managed to bring back was the simple truth that conquering the Middle Stratum is impossible.

I doubt that you could call such a thing a success.

First of all, we suffered setbacks while still in the Upper Stratum.

I pleaded that we should at least be permitted to explore the Upper Stratum a few times first to allow the team to gain some experience, since those without familiarity with the Great Elroe Labyrinth can struggle even on that level. Aside from adventurers like myself, there were many members of the exploration team who had never even stepped foot in the labyrinth before, like kingdom knights and scholars.

But my plea was summarily rejected as a waste of time.

As a result, around half of the members dropped out while we were still in the Upper Stratum.

While they fortunately did not perish, they were unable to keep up and had to turn back.

This is what I warned them would happen.

The Great Elroe Labyrinth is a place of perpetual darkness, where one cannot tell day from night.

One must first get accustomed to that darkness, or it will take a serious toll on the mind.

After all, we have to sleep and wake in darkness and press onward for days on end.

I knew that those who were not used to such conditions would quickly fall behind.

In the end, the ones who made it to the Middle Stratum at all were mostly those like me who had experience with the Great Elroe Labyrinth.

Out of all of those who had never entered the labyrinth before, only the knight who was chosen as the team’s leader managed to function properly on the journey.

Even in this predicament, we had no choice but to press on into the Middle Stratum.

In a word, the place was hell.

It was a world of perpetual blinding light, the polar opposite of the Upper Stratum.

The heat constantly assailed our bodies and senses.

Most of the monsters that sometimes attacked us did so at great distance from within the magma.

We could not venture into that magma, of course, and the warrior types who specialized in close combat were all but useless from that point on.

The one silver lining was that the monsters were not significantly stronger than those of the Upper Stratum.

We only ever encountered monsters that were equivalent to danger level D.

Though perhaps that’s only because we were unable to venture far enough to find any others.

In the end, our exploration did not continue for long.

Our forces had been reduced to less than half due to the blazing heat that chipped away at our stamina just by being in the area, being unable to get any decent sleep in the glaring light of the magma, and having the constant need for water to replace what was constantly being leeched from our bodies…

Our strength, willpower, rations, and water were draining far faster than we had anticipated.

Thus, we made the decision to turn back earlier than planned.

It goes without saying that we were scarcely able to map the Middle Stratum at all.

We certainly experienced the horror of the Middle Stratum firsthand.

But even then, perhaps that was only a glimpse of the real threats contained within.

After all, we were only to explore a tiny fraction of the area.

Perhaps the true terrors of the Middle Stratum lurk beyond the bounds of where we managed to tread.

Excerpted from the journal of Aifen the Adventurer

WHATISA SPIDER ANYWAY?

Lately, I feel like I’m starting to lose sight of the meaning of my existence.

I’ll just come out and say it.

Am I even acting like a spider at all anymore?

I thought spiders were supposed to, you know, make webs, lie in wait, and use their poisonous fangs to finish off prey that gets caught in their web or whatever. Something like that, right?

Meanwhile, I’m out here like…

Dodging my enemies’ attacks with blinding speed.

Shooting out magic spells like a damn machine gun.

Countering with my scythes if anything gets too close, or just pushing my way through with more magic anyway.

So, uh…what happened to the spider stuff?

Now I’m basically just a highly maneuverable, mobile, magic artillery unit. Thank you very much.

Or maybe a creature that just happens to visually resemble a spider?

Well, I am a monster, so I guess the “creature” part is still accurate.

Still, ever since magic became my primary method of attack, I feel like I’m becoming less spiderlike by the minute.

I guess it doesn’t help that I learned magic in the Middle Stratum, where I couldn’t use my thread anyway.

Until then, I was still getting by mainly with thread, one of the key tools of a spider.

Like, to the point where I couldn’t do anything without it.

But then I got stuck in a situation where I really couldn’t use thread, so I had to come up with ways of fighting that didn’t rely on it. And that’s where my shift away from spider-ness began.

At first, I was still using poison, which kept me from straying too far out of the “spider” category, but then I went and learned magic.

Especially when I picked up Dark Magic as an offshoot of Shadow Magic. It’s so convenient that I dropped the spider stuff completely.

I mean, can you blame me? You can’t beat convenience.

Nothing wrong with using something that makes your life easier!

At this point, using thread to restrict my opponents’ movements and then one-sidedly pummeling them with magic from a safe distance has become my winning strategy.

I guess, since thread is still involved, you could say that maybe, just barely, technically, theoretically, there’s the teensiest trace of spidery stuff still remaining, probably. Or not.

Yeah, no, please don’t say that I stopped being spiderlike as soon as I started using magic at all.

On the other hand, the Evil Eye stuff is invaluable against small fry but doesn’t really work very well on the stronger enemies.

I’ve been using the fact that I have eight eyes to invoke multiple kinds of Evil Eyes at the same time.

Since that makes use of the unique physiology of a spider, I’m still plenty spiderlike, right?

Yeah, yeah, I know.

There’s nothing spiderlike about the concept of Evil Eyes in the first place.

For that matter, as soon as you start throwing in any fantasy concepts—be it magic, Evil Eyes, or whatever else—I guess you lose the spiderlike status immediately.

Threads and poison are still firmly within the scope of classic spidery-ness, but once you start using all this crazy stuff like magic…y’know?

But still, it’s not like I ever had the option not to use it.

Especially when I was in the kind of environment where I had to prioritize using what was most convenient, if I even wanted to survive.

So I don’t regret that one bit.

Even if the end result is that I’m slowly losing the right to call myself a spider at all.

I mean, this world itself is already a fantasy setting, and I’m a monster, a staple of the fantasy genre, right?

So there’s nothing wrong with me taking on some fantasy traits myself!

My departure from spidery-ness was inevitable, I tell you!

I basically just did a class change from a spider to a full-fledged monster!

And if I’m a monster, there’s nothing wrong with me using magic or Evil Eyes or whatever!

So I’m fine like this, dammit!

At least, that’s what I’m telling myself.

Truth be told, I’m barely spiderlike at all anymore.

Sure, I still use stuff like threads and poison, but I’ve got a lot of other tricks up my sleeve now. They’re not my only weapons like they used to be at the beginning.

A-ha! I just realized! I’ve got it backward!

I’m moving beyond the limits of a spider—that’s what’s going on!

In other words, I’m like a spider celebrity.

It’s not that I’m becoming less spiderlike; it’s that other spiders are falling behind the times.

Is that crazy or what?

Without even realizing it, I’ve been forging a whole new era of spider history!

I always knew I was the best.

Maybe the other spiders just need to follow my example and learn to use magic and Evil Eyes and stuff, no?

Then nobody could say that I’m not spiderlike, that’s for sure.

’Cause I’d be the spider on the cutting edge of what it means to be a spider!

If I become the leading expert on spider potential, I’d truly be the greatest spider of all time!

The other spiders would all look up to me, and they’d even start copying my style. I’m sure of it!

Although, it’s gonna take more than superficial imitation to get as good as I am, so good luck with that, losers.

Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

Nah, just kidding. I’d never let anyone copy me.

I know better than anyone what a huuuge pain in the ass I am.

The last thing I need is for there to be another pain in the ass besides me.

I’m the only celebrity the spider world needs, got it?

I’m not gonna let them turn me into a fad.

SPIDER VS CICADA

When you think about summer, what’s the first image that comes to mind?

Festivals?

Mm-hmm, yup.

Summer festivals sure are nice.

Especially the food stalls, the food stalls, and the food stalls.

Yakisoba, cotton candy, all that stuff, they’ve got such a devilish charm… You know it’s all kinda overpriced, and yet you can’t help buying it anyway.

There’s also going for a swim at the beach, mountain climbing to escape the heat, and all kinds of other good stuff.

But summer’s not all fun and games.

It’s super-hot, for one thing.

And there’s one sound that makes the heat feel even more intense.

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

That’s right: cicadas.

The chorus of cicada song is emblematic of summer in Japan.

Just hearing that summery song makes it feel like your body temperature is rising.

So when I hear the cries of a cicada, I think, “Ah, summer’s arrived in this world, too.”

I am a spider.

As of yet, I have no name.

Yeah, I’m borrowing the introduction from a famous Soseki novel again. But alas, this is no joke. It’s serious information.

’Cause if being reincarnated in another world wasn’t freaky enough, it’s even freakier that I got reincarnated as a monster, specifically a spider.

This world has concepts like levels and skills, so it’s a fantasy world, not like old-fashioned realism.

So, of course, there are monsters here, too.

And I was reborn as one of those monsters—a spider.

Now, I would love to demand an explanation from the god that made these arrangements.

But no matter how much I complain, it won’t change the fact that I’m a spider now.

Besides, what’s important isn’t what you were born as.

It’s what you make of yourself!

Okay, fine, I’m just trying to sound cool.

Anyway, now that I’m a spider, I realize there are worse things I could’ve been reincarnated as.

Take the beast in front of me, for example.

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

This eardrum-rending ruckus is coming from, you guessed it, a giant cicada.

Yep.

This is a fantasy world, not old-fashioned realism.

So, of course, there are cicada monsters, too, I guess.

Spiders and cicadas.

One’s a predator; the other is prey.

If you had to pick one, wouldn’t you obviously prefer the spider?

I don’t wanna get eaten, dude!

I wanna be the one doing the eating!

And what happens when a predator encounters prey?

Well, it’s hunting time, obviously!

I’m actually pretty strong, even though I might not look it.

After all, I survived here in the Great Elroe Labyrinth, an enormous kill-or-be-killed dungeon, and escaped in one piece!

Huh? You think I shouldn’t brag until I’ve conquered the whole thing?

Don’t be stupid.

As if any sane living being could conquer that insane place.

It was hard enough for me, a sane spider, to escape at all.

And before you ask, I’m not responding to any questions about the “sane” part, thank you.

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

Anyway, how am I gonna beat this cicada?

For that matter, is it actually a cicada?

I mean, the thing’s gigantic.

A single tree can’t even support its weight. It’s sitting there with each of its legs curled around a different tree.

Its body has the black luster of a beetle, and its wings refract light in all colors of the rainbow.

Again, it is a cicada… right?

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

I mean, it doesn’t exactly look like a regular cicada, but it’s making the cicada sound and stuff.

Let’s just call it a cicada and be done with it.

Anyway, every time this giant cicada makes its shrieky song, the bird monsters trying to approach it get blown away.

Like me, they’re trying to hunt that giant cicada—and they’re totally getting the tables turned on them.

Birds losing to a cicada, huh…

Then again, I guess it’s kind of understandable.

When I Appraise the cicada’s stats, I can see why.

<Skreemin LV 10

Status

HP: 1,600/1,600 (green) (details)

MP: 1,235/1,599 (blue) (details)

SP: 1,543/1,543 (yellow) (details)

897/1,566 (red) (details)

Average Offensive Ability: 1,629 (details)

Average Defensive Ability: 1,577 (details)

Average Magical Ability: 1,601 (details)

Average Resistance Ability: 1,574 (details)

Average Speed Ability: 1,556 (details)

Is the name “Skreemin” supposed to be a joke or what?

More importantly, damn, those stats are high!

Most of its stats are right around the 1,600 mark.

If you’re wondering how strong that is exactly, it’s lower than the greater wyrm I once fought in the Great Elroe Labyrinth but higher than an average wyrm monster.

In other words, it’s on par with a decent-ranking wyrm.

So it’s a wyrm-level cicada. (…Is it a cicada?)

By the way, the bird monsters that keep charging at the cicada and getting knocked back repeatedly have stats that are all less than one hundred.

I dunno why you guys thought attacking that cicada was a good idea!

Anyone with half a brain can see that you’d never be able to beat it.

What’s driving them to do something so stupid?

Is it, like, their pride as a bird species?

Y’know… That “we’re not gonna lose to the likes of a measly insect!” mentality or whatever?

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

Nah, it’s probably just that the sound is so explosively loud that they’re attacking out of irritation.

I can’t blame ’em for wanting to lodge a complaint or two when someone’s making such a racket on their turf.

By the way, when I say “explosively loud,” I don’t mean it’s as loud as an explosion.

I mean the sound literally explodes.

Every time that giant cicada goes skree, the shockwaves from the sound spread in all directions and knock back anything in range that’s not tied down.

It’s like a sonic bomb.

Yep.

You might think there’s no way sound could produce a shockwave like that, but remember, this is a fantasy world, not old-fashioned realism.

That must be the effect of the giant cicada’s Sound Attack skill.

I guess even though the skill level is low, its high overall stats make up for that.

So every single skree is followed by a big kaboom.

And the damn thing never stops shrieking.

Meaning the explosions don’t stop, either.

I’m guessing it can control the direction of the blasts to an extent because the trees it’s standing on are still intact. Still, that doesn’t change the fact that you can’t carelessly approach something that’s continually setting off explosive blast waves all over the damn place.

This stupid cicada has somehow turned itself into an impregnable fortress.

I thought cicadas were just bugs that got kind of noisy during the summer but were otherwise mostly harmless.

Well, I guess that’s a fantasy world for you.

In this cutthroat world, even a cicada can evolve into an unexpectedly dangerous beast.

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

Just like that, another bird falls prey to the cicada.

If things go on like this, all the bird monsters in the area are gonna get wiped out!

Not that I really care that much, but that seems like it would mess up the whole local ecosystem or something like that.

So how am I gonna beat this thing?

Quite frankly, just defeating that cicada wouldn’t be too hard.

I’ve got ways of attacking from a distance, like Evil Eyes and magic and stuff.

I can just shoot at it from outside the range of its exploding sound waves, easy peasy.

…What’s a spider supposed to be like again?

Well, never mind. This is a fantasy world, not old-fashioned realism.

Even a spider can evolve into an unexpectedly dangerous—me.

In fact, if I didn’t evolve into something this dangerous, I never would’ve survived the Great Elroe Labyrinth in the first place!

But we’re not in the Great Elroe Labyrinth anymore.

I can survive without pulling out all the stops for every fight.

Which is why I’m thinking I’ll go back to the basics and try to defeat that cicada using only my original spider weapons: thread and poison.

Why would I go to all that trouble, you ask?

Well, because I’ve been using so much magic and Evil Eyes and junk lately that I barely even feel like a spider anymore, okay?!

I’m gonna restore my spider identity by fighting like one for a change.

Of course, if I was fighting something so scary that I wouldn’t be able to win without using everything I’ve got, that’d be a different story.

But this cicada isn’t even as strong as the greater wyrms I’ve beaten before.

And when all is said and done, I’ve also beaten dragons by now, which are even stronger than those wyrms.

So one lousy cicada will be a piece of cake.

That’s why I can afford to mess around like this.

But wait!

Just because I’m messing around doesn’t mean I can let my guard down.

Even if I can win easily in theory, this is still a battle to the death.

One wrong move could be fatal.

So aside from restricting my moves, I’m gonna take this seriously.

First things first, I gotta learn about my opponent.

I have the Appraisal skill, which allows me to see my targets’ stats.

Based on the information it gave me, that cicada is fairly strong.

If you consider that most of the monsters that show up in this area have stats averaging around one hundred, you’ll see how strong the cicada is by comparison.

If anything, you gotta wonder how and why a monster like that would suddenly appear around here.

Then again, it’s not hard to guess where the cicada came from in this case.

I’m gonna go with the huge freaking hole in the ground right near where the cicada is hanging out.

And next to that hole is a big old cicada shell.

Yeah, I’ll give you three guesses who that used to belong to.

My genius theory is that the cicada was in a larval state underground, then it came out and evolved into an adult.

From my half-remembered knowledge, cicadas have a super-long larval phase or something, right?

And then the lifespan of the adult is short.

It’s anyone’s guess whether that information even applies in this fantasy world, but if it had a long larval phase, that might help explain why it’s so damn huge.

And also why a few of its skills are ridiculously advanced, while the rest are still super-low.

The SP Minimized Consumption skill slows the reduction of SP, or stamina, which basically represents your satiation.

In other words, it’s a skill that lets you survive for a relatively long time without eating or drinking.

That right there is a clue to this thing’s life cycle.

It was probably sitting reeeal still underground for aaages.

Then, when it reached its limit, it used Earth Magic to move the dirt around, grab some food, and go back to sitting reeeeal still.

That’s the only explanation I’ve got.

And then, when the time comes, it emerges from the ground and becomes a full-grown cicada.

Every monster has a story.

And you can glean bits and pieces of those individual stories by checking out their stats.

Appraisal is pretty broken like that, if you ask me.

But whether that knowledge actually tells you anything about how to deal with the monsters is a whole other story.

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree…”

For one thing, I can’t get anywhere near it unless I do something about that damn exploding sound.

Heh.

But when you’re a genius like me, you can come up with a plan in no time flat.

First of all, it’s not like the sound waves are constantly exploding.

The explosions don’t go off during the long “skreeee”!

It builds up power with the “skreeee,” then sets off three explosions in a row with the “skree, skree, skree” part.

That’s the cicada’s attack pattern.

In other words, I just have to attack during the “skreeee” part, and either stop the “skree, skree, skree” before it happens or get out of there first.

Heh-heh-heh.

I’ve got this.

It’s in the bag!

Now I just need to wait for the timing to be right.

“Skreee, skree, skree, skree!”

Okay, get ready…

“Skreeee—”

Now!

I wait for the instant when the explosions stop and make a mad dash for the cicada.

My magic stats are the highest, followed closely by my speed.

I’m fast enough to take advantage of even the briefest of openings!

I jump on the back of the now-defenseless cicada and bite down!

WUH?!

My fangs do break the surface, but its carapace is so rock-hard that they don’t pierce all the way through.

Thanks to the combination of the cicada’s naturally high defense stat and its defense-enhancing Hard Armor skill, it’s so tough that I literally can’t sink my teeth into it with my attack power.

“Skree, skree, skree!”

Oh crap!!!

GWEH?!

The cicada hits me with the three-in-a-row explosion.

My fangs pop right out of its shell, and I get sent flying.

Ooogh.

I took damage, dammit.

It’s not nearly enough to kill me, but I was hoping to take this thing out in one hit.

That hurts my pride a little.

Dammit. Enough already!

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

The cicada starts shrieking again, way too triumphantly for my liking.

Now I’m getting annoyed.

So my fangs won’t work.

My attack power isn’t enough to pierce its tough defenses.

The thing is, my stats are really unbalanced.

My magic and speed stats are ridiculously high.

In fact, they’re even significantly higher than the dragons I was talking about before.

But on the flip side, my other stats are really low by comparison.

Even if they’re technically still higher than this cicada’s, they’re not enough to do huge amounts of damage in one blow.

A one-shot kill isn’t going to happen.

Which means my only option is to stop those explosions and gradually chip away at its health.

“Skreeee, skree, skree, skree!”

Wait for the right timing…

“Skreeee—”

Now!

I charge toward the cicada’s back again.

The cicada moves the part of its abdomen that makes the sound, as if mocking my attempts.

That’s the spot!

I aim for that part of the cicada and shoot out some thread.

The thread moves like it has a mind of its own, tying the cicada’s abdomen up tight.

With its movements hindered, the exploding sounds stop.

Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

How d’you like them apples, huh?!

A cicada without explosions is nothing but a big, sturdy target!

Wait…is that a cicada?

Well, whatever.

Now the cicada has lost its primary means of attack.

Which means I can finish it off however I please.

Let’s see, what should I do…fiiirst?!

“Bzzz, bzzz, bzzz, bzzz, bzzz!”

The cicada must be panicking without its exploding Sound Attack. It flaps its wings frantically and takes off into the air.

Hey, wait a second!

Don’t you realize I’m still attached to you?!

The thread that’s wrapped around the cicada’s abdomen is held by one of my legs.

It also happens to still be attached to where it came out of, aka my butt.

So what happens if the cicada starts flying around?

YEEEEK!

I’m going on a journey through the sky while dangling around in midair, that’s what.

The massive cicada flies very slowly.

After all, its Flight skill is still only level 1, even if its stats are decently high.

I guess that means it can’t fly very fast.

The low level makes sense: It probably just got the Flight skill when it evolved from a larva, which happened not that long ago.

Wait, it peed when it took off, though!

EWWW! Some of it got on me!

What the hell does this thing think it’s doing?!

Now I’m really pissed! Literally!

I’m gonna kill you!

I mean, I was already gonna do that, but now you’re really in for it!

It’s swerving around trying to shake me off, but that’s not going to happen as long as my thread is still attached.

I pull on the thread, gradually dragging myself closer to the cicada.

This apparently freaks the thing out because it starts thrashing around every which way in the air.

WHOOOA, BOOOOY!

This would be a really bad time for anyone who gets motion sickness.

But I’m totally fine, thanks to my Status Condition Nullification skill!

Does motion sickness count as a status condition?

Hmm, I wonder.

Well, I guess it doesn’t matter either way as long as I’m not getting sick.

Aaanyway, let’s do this thing!

I finally reach the cicada’s back by way of my thread.

It starts moving even more violently and doing somersaults, but you’re not gonna get rid of me that easily.

Hanging on to the cicada’s back, I search for the seams of its carapace.

When I find an opening, I sink my fangs in there.

If the armor is too hard, all you gotta do is find a soft spot, y’know?

My fangs can pierce through just fine once I’ve got a weak point.

Then all I have to do is let the poison flow on through.

Gradually weakening my prey with poison—now that’s spiderlike.

…Or so I thought, except my poison is so darn strong that the cicada loses its strength the second I start poisoning it and begins to fall out of the sky.

If I crash with it, I might get crushed by its stupidly large body, so I cut off the thread and jump free just as we get close to the ground.

Ta-da! I stick the landing beautifully.

The cicada is lying on its back, twitching a little.

Whew, I won.

No, wait. It’s too soon to celebrate.

Why? Because the cicada’s HP hasn’t run out yet.

As I slowly creep toward it, the cicada musters up the last of its strength to start thrashing around violently.

Oh boy, I’ve seen this kinda thing before.

In Japan, they call it a “cicada bomb.”

It’s when you walk up toward what you think is a dead cicada, and then it suddenly starts zooming around.

So cicada bombs are alive and well in this world, too, huh?

Well, I guess you can’t call it “alive and well” if one is on the verge of death…

Eventually, the poison finally overtakes the cicada, and it runs out of strength for real this time.

Whew. What a long, exhausting battle to the death.

I should never have set the dumb rule about not using my Evil Eyes or magic.

Then I could’ve skipped the tragedy of getting peed on, dammit!

Well, hindsight is 20/20. (Or is it 160/160 for a spider?)

I’ve learned my lesson about setting rules for fun.

Two lessons, in fact.

The second one is that even though cicadas are huge, they don’t have many edible parts.

Its insides are practically hollow, and the carapace is too hard to even think about eating.

After I worked so hard to take it down, too…

Next time I see a cicada, I’m just gonna ignore it.

I guess that’s lesson number three.

THREAD EATER

It was a shocking sight.

Maybe even the most shocking thing I’ve seen since I was reborn in this world.

That’s how disconcerting the scene before my eyes was.

Because… I mean… It’s a spider eating thread!

It happened while I was in the middle of being chased around by Mother and the demon lord and all that fun stuff.

I was avoiding attacks from those two while taking out Mother’s subordinate spiders in the Great Elroe Labyrinth.

And I just so happened to spy a Greater Taratect eating thread that it made itself!

There was a web it probably put up to try and catch me, and it was just munching on it like a snack.

I was like, what? You can eat that stuff?

I couldn’t believe my eyes.

I mean…it’s thread, you know?

Thread that you made yourself!

Thread that came out of your own butt, in fact!

I hate to put it so indelicately, but that’s basically…excrement.

Who would ever even think to eat something like that?!

Why in the world did you decide to do it?!

Were you really in that bad of a spot?

Like you would’ve died of starvation if you didn’t eat that stuff?

Nope. No waaay.

I mean, sure, since your body made it, I guess it probably wouldn’t wreck your stomach if you ate it, in theory…

But it just feels so wrong, you know what I mean?

If I were desperate enough to eat that, I’d just eat a snail-bug, you know?

Oof, on second thought… Urgh. I dunno.

It’s like the worst “would you rather” of all time!

I’m talking the same level as “poop-flavored curry or curry-flavored poop”!

I’d choose neither, thank you very much!

Hrmmm.

But now that I’ve seen another spider eating the stuff, I am the tiniest bit curious.

What in the world does thread taste like, exactly?

If I gave it just a little bit of stickiness, it might feel sorta like mochi.

When you think about it that way, it doesn’t sound so bad, does it?

Nope, nope, nope.

We’re still talking about taking something that came out of your butt and putting it in your mouth, you know?

Visually, it doesn’t seem so bad since I’m a spider and what I’d be eating is thread, but try thinking about it with a human instead.

Yeah, that’s what I thought!

You’d lose your dignity as a human being!

It might happen in some of the most maniacal corners of the Internet, but I know I certainly would never want to eat that!

Eugh! Absolutely not!

Even a glutton like me has things she is and isn’t willing to eat!

If it’s prey that I killed, I’ll eat it, whether it’s gross or not, because that’s just the rules of nature. It’s a matter of courtesy or even respect.

But is it okay to eat something like that just out of curiosity?

No, NO, NOOOOO!

It’s totally out of the question.

If I were really starving to the point of death and there was nothing else to eat, that might be another story. Just snacking on my own thread because I’m curious about how it tastes seems messed up.

If you replace thread with excrement in that sentence, you’d see how bad it sounds.

It’s not a question of flavor or whatever; it’s a question of ethics.

What’s wrong is wrong, and that’s final.

I still have my dignity as a spider, you know.

Then again, the Greater Taratect was eating it just fine, so I guess it’s more about my dignity as me.

Yup. That settles it. I’m not gonna eat it.

I keep telling myself I’m not gonna eat it. So why is it that I find myself staring down a piece of thread cut to just the right length?

Why is it the exact size and thickness to be mistaken for a marshmallow at a glance, perfectly bite-size?

Where’d this come from, I wonder?

Well, I’m not gonna eat it. I’m not, okay?

Except… Argh! It really does look like a marshmallow, which means it kinda looks tasty!

I’m not gonna eat it, I’m not gonna, I’m not…

Nom, nom.

Hmm. Doesn’t taste like anything.

It’s very plain. Flavorless.

Since it doesn’t have any kind of flavor, it doesn’t taste good or bad…or like I’m eating food at all, really.

I dunno, sort of like chewing on flavorless gum, maybe?

It’s not quite the same since you can swallow this stuff, but on an emotional level, it feels similar.

Like, I have no idea why I’m eating this.

Can you really get any nutritional value from this?

When I check my Appraisal, it looks like my SP did actually go up a little.

But since it costs SP to make thread in the first place, I feel like it basically just canceled itself out.

How exhausting. I’m never doing this nonsense again.

It really is wrong to try and eat stuff that came out of your own body.

Yup. I guess I just reaffirmed something that doesn’t require a lot of thought to understand in the first place.

PHYSICAL ABILITY TEST

I’m an Arachne now!

Now that I’m finally an Arachne, I have a spider body on the bottom and a human upper body on top, and I definitely need to figure out how it moves ASAP.

I mean, it’s totally different from how my body has been shaped all this time.

If I keep trying to move the same way I always have, it might not work as well as it did before.

And yet I got thrown right into the fire against a stupidly strong enemy like Potimas, of all things.

That was seriously a close call.

Which is why today, I’m going to experiment with the physical abilities of my new Arachne form.

Although, it’s probably fine since I was able to maneuver well enough against Potimas and all.

Just to be extra safe, I wanna make sure this body can do anything I might need to do in a serious battle.

First of all, let’s start with a hundred-meter dash.

On your mark…get set…GO!

If there were an actual starting pistol, I would’ve made it to the finish line before the shot was even done echoing.

Yup. That acceleration just shows how insanely high my speed stat has gotten.

My lower back kinda hurts now, though.

My human upper half got blown back by the wind resistance and instantly messed up my back.

It feels like I got put on a roller coaster without any seat backs, then immediately took off at top speed.

Ooogh, that hurts.

Now this is unexpected.

I don’t remember this happening when I fought Potimas…

Oh, wait a second.

When I fought Potimas, my stats were lowered thanks to his stupid barrier.

Got it. So I was able to handle it that time because I was still moving at relatively sane speeds.

But when I take off at top speed, this is the result.

Hmmm.

This is…kind of a big problem.

Am I gonna get major back pain every time I run at top speed now?

Lemme try it again.

That only happened because I wasn’t ready.

This time, I’ll prepare myself properly before I start running.

Abs, spine, it’s your time to shine!

By the way, my old self basically had no muscles at all!

Push-ups?

So I couldn’t do a single one, so what?

Anyway, this time I try to brace my human body and then start running.

The wall of wind resistance slams against my upper half, but I manage to push through without getting knocked backward like before.

Okay, got it. Seems like I can run fine as long as I put some strength into my core.

Still, with the half-human, half-spider body of an Arachne, it doesn’t feel the same as running as a spider or a human.

Good thing I tested this out, then.

If I’d run at top speed in an actual battle, I might’ve managed to seriously hurt myself.

I guess it just happened to work out okay when I fought Potimas.

Yikes, scary.

At any rate, this is only what happens when I run in a straight line.

What about if I throw in a zig-zag pattern, taking tight turns, wall-running, and that kinda stuff?

I’d better test all that out, too.

So I do a little bit of everything.

In the end, as I should’ve expected, I learn that I’ll have to brace my human upper half or else it’ll get thrown around left and right and give me more back pain.

If anything, it almost feels closer to riding around on a motorcycle than running on my own legs.

Although I’m just guessing here ’cause I’ve never ridden a motorcycle before.

But it’s like I’m riding the vehicle that is my spider body.

I’m slowly starting to get the hang of running as an Arachne, which isn’t quite like running as a human or a spider.

Yep, this is going pretty well.

I think I’ve mostly got a handle on it now.

Now that I’ve got this down, I should be able to run around at top speed in a real battle without giving myself whiplash.

While I’m at it, I also practice attacking with the scythes on my forelegs while I’m running.

And throwing punches as a human, too.

Except…my human punches feel kinda wimpy.

Urgh, my lower back is bugging me again.

According to my wealth of manga and game knowledge, your lower body is an important factor for the power of a punch.

Throwing a punch with arm strength alone doesn’t amount to much.

Thanks to my high stats, my punch probably still has a considerable amount of power behind it, but it still feels kinda flimsy…

It’s the punch of a person who clearly has no idea what she’s doing.

But how the heck do I put my lower body into a punch when I have the body of an Arachne?

There was nothing about this in my manga or games, that’s for sure…

Hmm. I guess I’ll have to experiment and find a way to throw a good punch on my own.

It doesn’t quite work to try to move like a human when I’m an Arachne, after all.

I mean, even just running turned into a whole thing.

All in all, the experiments were useful, but I also learned that mastering movement with an Arachne body is gonna take longer than I thought. Whew.

DRAGON BREATH

Divine Dragon Power, as the name implies, is a skill that grants the user access to certain dragon strengths and abilities.

You spend MP and SP to activate it. As long as it’s active, your stats go up, and it reduces the effects of enemy magic.

Basically, it’s like a lesser version of the magic-blocking Scale skills that real dragons have.

With this, my already ridiculously high magic defense reaches a truly untouchable level.

But that’s not important right now.

See, Divine Dragon Power has other effects, too.

Namely, it allows you to shoot out Dragon Breath.

You know, Dragon Breath—the classic dragon attack where they breathe fire or whatever.

If you need an example of how strong it is, look no further than that one time the earth dragon Araba blew away my entire home with a single Breath attack.

That being said, the Dragon Breath you can use with Divine Dragon Power is still only a lesser version of the kind real dragons use.

But still, its power is influenced by the user’s stats…so with my current stats, I can fire off a Breath attack that’s waaay stronger than your average dragon.

Also, the attribute of the Breath attack that comes out is apparently based on whatever attribute the user excels at the most.

In my case, that’s the Dark attribute.

Visually, that means it looks like I’m shooting some kinda black wave of energy out of my mouth.

Now, that never really bothered me before.

It doesn’t even bother me now.

As long as I’m shooting it out of my spider body, that is.

Yes, Breath attacks come out of the mouth.

And as an Arachne, I happen to have two mouths.

Specifically, a human mouth and a spider mouth.

Now, shooting Breath out of my spider mouth is all well and good.

My spider body already looks plenty monstrous, so it’s not that weird if a black Breath attack goes spewing out of its mouth like BWOOSH!

But how do you think it looks when my human mouth does it?

First of all, to shoot out a Breath attack, my mouth has to open reeeally wide.

This is already not a pretty picture.

But on top of that, the recoil from firing a full-power Breath attack is no joke, so you really have to brace yourself before you do it.

For the spider body, that just means I have to plant my eight legs firmly on the ground. Easy enough.

But for the human body, which grows out of the spider body, I end up having to take a really weird pose if I wanna brace myself right.

It’s kinda like if you’re sitting on a chair with no back, and you have to resist your head getting dragged backward using only your upper body strength.

Yeah. Not pretty.

And then in that very unsexy pose, I shoot a Breath attack out of my mouth like BWOOSH!

Literally, just spewing it out.

Like vomit, okay?

That’s fine for the spider body.

If a monster spews a big Breath attack out of its mouth, it’s actually pretty cool looking, right?

But how do you think it looks when a human does it?

I’ll tell you! Incredibly uncool!

If you picture that one famous fighting game character with stretchy limbs, you might be able to see how uncool it looks.

Y*ga Fire! Y*ga Flame!

Yeah, like that, except it’s me doing it!

Not pretty. Not pretty at all!

At first, I was all excited, too. “Since I have two mouths now, I could do a double Breath attack and stuff!” But when I tested it out, the visuals were unbelievably bad!

I mean, it’s not like I did it in front of a mirror, so I can’t see it from an outside perspective, but sometimes you can just tell how stupid you look even if you can’t see it for yourself.

This was one of those times.

So from now on, I won’t be using Dragon Breath with my human form, ever.

I am technically a lady, after all.

Even I want to maintain the barest illusion of looking ladylike.

And the way I look vomiting black Breath attacks out of my human mouth is definitely not it.

Of course, I’d do it if I didn’t have any other choice…except I have plenty of other attack methods besides Dragon Breath anyway.

Maybe if I were in some very specific situation where my mouth was the only thing I could move, then I guess it would technically be an option, but as long as my head is intact, then I can still just use magic, y’know?

And even if the double Breath attack is fairly powerful, I can easily swap it out for any number of other moves.

Yeah. There’s almost no reason I would ever need to use this.

Although the almost in that sentence bothers me.

For instance, it could be handy if I wanted to catch an opponent by surprise.

That would mean they’d see me looking extremely unladylike, though.

Oh well. As long as I make sure to bury them, there’d be no witnesses left.

It’s risky, all right.

Once I use it, I then have to make sure I kill anyone who might have seen it.

A forbidden technique.

The human-form Breath attack.

What a terrifying move.

TASTE

Since becoming an Arachne, I’ve realized something: As it turns out, my sense of taste was kinda weird before.

What I mean is, my spider and human halves taste things differently.

When I try to eat raw monster flesh with my human form, which I’ve always been able to eat just fine as a spider, it suddenly tastes gross.

Okay, that’s not quite right. It was always pretty gross, even in my spider form.

But when I eat gross monster meat as a spider, I can still choke it down. In my human form, not so much.

I can handle it to a certain extent, but if it’s something especially gross, like meat from a poisonous monster, I just can’t do it.

It makes me feel like I’m gonna barf.

Just kidding. I did barf.

It was just your standard frog from the Great Elroe Labyrinth.

When I ate it with my human form, I threw up.

But I mean, come on, can you blame me?

First of all, it’s so bitter.

Most poisonous monsters are bitter to an extent, but the strength of the bitterness varies based on how strong their poison is.

Frogs are pretty much the weakest of the poisonous monsters, and their poison isn’t all that strong, so the bitterness isn’t that bad.

And yet when it touched my human taste buds, I was overpowered by bitterness.

Also, it’s really gamey.

I guess that should be obvious when you think about it, being frog meat and all.

Of course, it’s got a certain amphibious stank to it.

And to top it all off, it’s slimy.

Well, yeah. Again, it’s a frog.

You gotta assume it’ll be kinda slimy.

Add it all up, and you get some supremely gross meat.

I couldn’t believe I’d been eating stuff like this without (much of) a problem all this time.

But after I puked it out, when I tried eating frog meat with my spider form again, what do you know? I could eat it just fine.

It was still gross, but not so gross that I couldn’t keep it down.

Based on all this, it’s safe to assume that my human half has the same sense of taste as a normal human, while my spider half has the same sense of taste as a normal spider.

I’m just guessing, though. I actually don’t even know if normal spiders can taste things or not.

My spider form must have some natural resistance to grossness so that it can eat stuff like raw monster meat.

…But if that’s the case, what would happen if I ate a snail-bug with my human form, when it was already so lethally disgusting in my spider form?

Yeah, no.

That would be way too dangerous.

I can’t put my life on the line just to satisfy a little curiosity.

Besides, I don’t need to eat gross stuff anyway.

Unlike the old days, now I have choices besides the grossest monster meat around!

Then why did I eat a frog in the first place? Shhh, don’t ask so many questions.

Let’s look at it the other way. What happens if I eat something with my human form that was delicious to me as a spider?

Like the catfish from the Middle Stratum, for instance.

Back in my pure spider days, that was the first food I ate that actually tasted good to me. But oddly enough, when I tried it as a human, it wasn’t that impressive.

In fact, to be totally honest, it didn’t taste very good at all.

But when I eat it with my spider form, it still tastes delicious to me.

I’m surprised that my sense of taste could differ so drastically between my human and spider halves.

They’re both part of the same body—mine.

Generally, eating the kind of cuisine that a human would eat tastes better for my human half than my spider half.

It still tastes good enough with my spider form, too, but when it’s food that’s been cooked—especially food that’s been properly seasoned—the flavor ends up being a little too strong for my spider tastes.

I guess I’ve gotten too used to eating unseasoned monster meat.

Maybe it’s like when you give fast food to someone who’s accustomed to humble Buddhist cuisine?

No, I guess that’s still not quite the same.

At any rate, it’s not really a problem as long as I eat human food with my human half and monsters with my spider half.

But there is one exception that tastes equally delicious in either form.

You guessed it: sweetness.

Sweet stuff tastes just as delicious whether I eat it with my human half or spider half.

The only real sweet food in this world is fruit.

There’s no chocolate or anything like that.

Maybe I just haven’t looked hard enough. Even when I was having my fifteen minutes of “local god” fame, though, there was nothing like that in all the sweets they offered me.

It was all fruit.

And they were all totally delicious.

Being a different world and all, there wasn’t anything like the standard apples and oranges and stuff I used to know. But it was actually even more exciting to eat each new fruit, wondering what it would taste like.

Honestly, this world might have the old one beat in terms of fruit deliciousness, if nothing else.

Even compared to the fruits on Earth that were selectively bred to be extra tasty, these ones were all just as good, if not better.

That may be the only time I’ve felt lucky to have been reborn in this world.

I can’t help scarfing them down all the time.

…At that rate, my blood sugar could be a concern, though.

I should be more careful.

Okina Baba Q&A Interview Part 1

In these pages, we’ll ask Okina Baba, the author of So I’m a Spider, So What?, questions about the series and behind-the-scenes stories.

First, let’s discuss some of the main attractions: the protagonist and the writing process.

I first decided on the framework, like the setting and lore, then thought about the flow of things from there.

Managing Editor (“Editor”): Coming in hot with something people have been dying to know! Why did you make the protagonist a spider?

Okina Baba-sensei (“Baba”): I get this question a lot, but as you know, I didn’t have any particular attachment to spiders or even a strong interest in them. A spider just happened to appear in my dream the night that I started writing the story, so I decided to go with that.

Editor: Did you already have the ending of the story planned out when you first started writing?

Baba: I did, indeed. The whole story was basically reverse engineered. I started with an endpoint, figured out what components would be needed to get there, and then came up with the beginning based on that. I first decided on the framework, like the setting and lore, then thought about the flow of things from there.

Editor: If you decided on the setting and lore early on, I imagine there was a possibility that it could have been a multi-POV or third-person story. Was there a reason you specifically decided on a first-person point of view?

Baba: Yes, my intention was that by making it first-person from the protagonist’s point of view, the reader would learn about the mysteries of the world alongside her. I thought that gradually gaining information from the same perspective as her would make the world feel more real to the reader. But, of course, I couldn’t show them the entire setting and lore just through Kumoko’s eyes, which is how Shun’s perspective came to be. After all, Kumoko starts out in a dark dungeon and spends ages just fighting monsters in there…so that doesn’t let me convey anything about the world or its secrets…

Editor: Ah, so does that mean that the entire class being reincarnated wasn’t necessarily the plan from the beginning, but rather came about as a means of expanding the world and story beyond Kumoko’s perspective?

Baba: That’s right. The thought process basically went like this: Decide on the lore and the end of the story → convey the story through Kumoko, the POV character → can’t really explain things properly without other perspectives, so → let’s just reincarnate the whole class!

About monster and character names

Editor: There are a lot of unique names for both monsters and characters in the story. How do you come up with these names? Are they based on anything?

Baba: For monster names, I generally decided by sound. I come up with a good-sounding name and search for it, and if no other series is using it, then I go with that. And the character names are really pretty arbitrary.

About the protagonist, “me” (Kumoko)

Editor: Our protagonist is very positive, determined, and hates to lose, the kind of main character readers find themselves rooting for. Was her personality based on a real person, inspired by characters from other series, or anything like that?

Baba: Not at all. I was trying to think of a character who would be easy to write, with the kind of energy that would really keep the words flowing, and that’s just how she turned out. Without that energy, the story and situations would really be quite dark, so it might be unpleasant to read at times… I mean, imagine being born into a spider colony, in a life-or-death struggle for survival, and you’re a spider, too… It’s a pretty tough scenario, isn’t it? Without Kumoko’s level of upbeat energy, it would end up being super-serious and heavy.

Editor: Even besides her energy, I think there’s something about Kumoko that makes her very likable; you’ve really created a character that readers want to see succeed. Even when she does things that are kind of terrible or make her seem coldhearted, you still manage to keep her likable somehow.

Baba: Maybe it’s because she’s the type of character who doesn’t mince words? She always just blurts out whatever she’s thinking in her ongoing monologue, so it might be that she’s easy to understand. Even if there are some readers who think, “I really don’t agree with what this protagonist is thinking,” they can still accept it because the thought process that led to her conclusion is laid out clearly. So maybe they like that there’s never the stress of wondering, “Why would she do such a thing?” even if you disagree with her.

About the writing process

Editor: The early stages of the story are all about Kumoko fighting in the labyrinth. Out of those battle scenes, is there one that was the most fun or satisfying to write for you?

Baba: If we’re limiting it to battle scenes, I think the Araba showdown was the most satisfying. It’s like the culmination of all of her battles in the labyrinth. As a matter of fact, most of her other fights were random encounters—Araba is the only foe that Kumoko challenged to a fight of her own accord.

Editor: That’s a good point! I feel like she was always getting attacked and frantically fighting for her life until then.

Baba: So the fact that she chose this fight for herself makes it an even more meaningful battle. Especially since most of her fights after leaving the labyrinth are random encounters, too!

Editor: She gets chased by Mother, found by the demon lord, gets her butt kicked…

Baba: And has a run-in with Poti (Potimas)… LOL.

Editor: What about scenes that aren’t battles?

Baba: I had fun writing the Parallel Minds’ interactions. They’re like a comedy routine, playing off of each other. Except they’re all the same person.

Editor: They certainly made the inside of her brain a lot livelier. On that subject, what made you decide to create the Parallel Minds?

Baba: It just kind of happened…I guess? The idea for a skill that allows you to have multiple thoughts at the same time just came naturally, and then when I got to thinking about what would happen if that skill evolved, I thought, “If it gave you more inner selves…would that be funny or what?” One person, two roles? That’d be super-surreal! In the end, it wound up being one person, four roles.

Editor: That was really fun to read, but I bet it was a pain to write, LOL.

Editor: So, on that note, are there any scenes in the labyrinth that were especially difficult to write?

Baba: Not that I can think of…but then again, I suppose the majority of the battle scenes were hard to write.

Editor: Is there any one battle that sticks out? One that you struggled with a lot and rewrote over and over, for instance?

Baba: I don’t believe I really rewrote any of the battle scenes in the labyrinth.

Editor: What?! That’s amazing! Is that because you had a clear goal in mind for what each battle was supposed to achieve, perhaps?

Baba: Quite the opposite. The truth is, most of the labyrinth battles didn’t have any particular goal, so I was writing them by the seat of my pants. Maybe that gave them an extra sense of realism.

Editor: Does that mean you felt just like Kumoko, trying to figure out how she would win the fight even as you were writing it?

Baba: Yes, exactly. And because I was writing it so haphazardly, there’s one that was a real problem…the monkey battle. As I was writing it, I was racking my brains: “Now that I’ve introduced something this tough, how is she supposed to come out ahead?”

Editor: You wrote yourself into a corner! LOL. Were you worried that you might hit a literal dead end while you were writing?

Baba: Right, yeah. I kept thinking, “Oh crap! At this rate, Kumoko’s going to die! I’ve got to do something! I have to find her a way out of this mess!” In the comments section on Nico Seiga, people said things like, “Man, she’s always on the verge of death.” I was like, “You’re telling me!” LOL.

Favorite monsters

Editor: Out of all the monsters in the labyrinth, which one do you feel the most emotional attachment to?

Baba: Hmm, probably Araba, I’d say.

Editor: Now that you mention it, why did Araba’s final moment end the way it did? I would say that a lot of “zero-to-hero” type stories follow a similar structure—the protagonist builds up lots of power and finally beats the last boss, and it feels great! But the Araba battle isn’t like that at all.

Baba: It’s partly because I wanted to embed the message that “winning isn’t always a victory.”

Editor: What do you mean by “not a victory”?

Baba: Wanting to win against Araba was purely Kumoko’s personal feeling; that battle had nothing to do with Araba’s feelings at all. Kumoko defeated Araba and conquered her trauma, but when you look at it from a larger perspective, what did that victory really mean? That’s what I was thinking about. Also, something else was bothering me: If she did beat Araba and overcome her fears, was Araba just an obstacle for Kumoko to overcome? Surely Araba also had his own way of life. I didn’t want to use him as nothing more than a device to make Kumoko feel good about herself.

Editor: I suppose in retrospect, it might have felt unsatisfactory if she just beat him normally there.

Baba: I also wanted to make it a moment that had meaning to Kumoko, like she lives the way she does from then on because of that battle with Araba. After she leaves the labyrinth, she goes on to fight lots of strong enemies, and I was worried they might overshadow her battle with Araba. It’s because of their battle that Kumoko became her present self. His warrior-like lifestyle had a definite effect on the way Kumoko thinks. So I think that made Araba a more memorable character.

About the gamelike mechanics

Editor: There are an awful lot of skills and titles. How do you manage them all?

Baba: Basically, they started from random whims. I enjoyed thinking about things like, “It’d be fun if there was a skill like this,” “Maybe if it had this kind of effect,” and so on. Then I kept adding more and more and more…and when I hit a certain amount, maybe I would add a title that’s an advanced version of some of them…and it just kind of got out of control, LOL.

Editor: Of course, LOL.

Baba: In a way, you could say that the reason Kumoko becomes a god is so that I don’t have to do status displays anymore! LOL. It was all fun and games at first…but along the way, it was more like, “Crap, she leveled up again! Let’s see, the formula is, uhhh…!” It got way too complicated. Forget about all these detailed skills and stats and such, ha-ha. If anyone out there is thinking of writing a story with carefully constructed skills and all that, I’d like to tell them, “Wait just a minute. That’s going to become a huge pain eventually.”

Editor: Just as Kumoko herself observes in the story, it’s a very gamelike world… There are a lot of video game–like mechanics. When it came to creating these mechanics, like skills and so on, was there anything that influenced you or that you used as a reference?

Baba: I was actually more influenced by other Narou (Shousetsuka ni Narou) novels than games. Of course, there’s some video game influence as well, though. The SP system was inspired by the stamina gauge in Monster Hunter, for instance.

Editor: Really?! You’ve mentioned that you like games, so I just assumed games were the main influence.

Baba: When I first started writing, the big trend on Narou was isekai reincarnation stories with an RPG-like system. Like Reincarnated as a Slime, for one.

Editor: So you were influenced by the current trend in Narou novels and made up your mind to write an isekai reincarnation with a game-like system.

Baba: When I was reading all these RPG system stories, what I was most curious about was, “How exactly does this end?” You know, like the question of who’s going to be the “big bad.” At the time, the final boss was a god in a lot of these novels. Like, “We’re going to fight god with our maxed-out stats and skills!” That sort of thing. But to me, the problem with that is this: Aren’t stats and skills under a god’s jurisdiction in the first place? I questioned, “Can you really challenge a god and win using something that a god created?” And then I wondered, “Why would a god even make things like stats and skills in the first place?” Those questions might have planted the first seed of So I’m a Spider, So What?

About the traits of the different races in the story

Editor: When I read this story, I was surprised that demons don’t have any distinguishing physical traits—their appearance is no different from humans. Was there some reason behind that?

Baba: There’s a lore-related reason, so I couldn’t give them any distinguishing physical features. That will eventually be explained in detail within the story. Please look forward to it!

Editor: The elves playing a villainous role was novel, too. More often than not, they’re depicted as an upstanding, beautiful race of nature-lovers. Is there a reason you cast elves as the villains in this story? It could’ve just as easily been dwarves or something else.

Baba: It’s not that I wanted it to be elves specifically; rather, my reasoning was that I wanted a race that’s typically cast as the protagonist’s allies. So, rather than setting out to make elves evil, I landed on elves as a result of aiming for an unexpected villain, one that would catch readers by surprise. In most series, elves are usually on the side of good, after all. I wanted the reaction to be like, “Nooo, these are the worst elves ever!”

Editor: So you were going against the grain.

Baba: I think a lot of elements in So I’m a Spider, So What? end up going against the grain, and in most cases, it was a deliberate choice. It’s not necessarily because I was trying to set it apart from other series; it’s just that my contrarian instincts told me that it would be more interesting with the element of surprise.

Editor: That makes sense. This series has a lot of twists and reveals that make the reader say, “Wait, what?! Really?!”

Baba: One of the earliest instances of this betrayal of expectations is Appraisal, which I think worked rather well. Normally, it’s the kind of skill that would give a huge advantage right away, but instead, it’s a garbage skill that only gives results like “Rock” and “Wall.”

Editor: That certainly was a shock. I could feel poor Kumoko’s disappointment in my bones, LOL.

About elements that were scrapped

Editor: As we’ll see in later sections of this EX volume, you really put a lot of details into the backstories and skills of the other reincarnations. Are there any characters, scenes, or other elements that you wanted to include in the story, but they wound up getting cut or scrapped?

Baba: The character I feel like I let down the most is Yuri. My original intention with Shun’s party was “a harem party no one would want to have.” So the members were a teacher who’s hiding something shady (Filimøs), a yandere little sister (Sue), a genderswapped former best friend (Katia), and a former classmate turned religious fanatic (Yuri).

Editor: That’s one unhinged party.

Baba: But Shun’s side of the story wound up a lot more serious than I expected, so I never really had a chance to show the “this harem party sucks!” side of things. I had an idea for a “this all-male (sausage) party sucks!” version, too. Professor Oriza, Parton, and some of the other named academy characters were actually candidates for Shun’s party. Professor Oriza was going to gradually end up as part of Shun’s team, grumbling, “How did things turn out like this…?” but following them anyway. Parton would say, “Anything for Sir Schlain!” with sparkling eyes and do his best (but get beat up a lot). Then we’d add Mr. Basgath, Hyrince, and so on until it was like, “Dammit, it’s nothing but dudes!” That was one potential future for Shun’s party, but it wasn’t very appealing, so I dropped it.

Editor: Two of those are just random middle-aged guys anyway, LOL.

Baba: Right, one guy’s way too intense (Basgath), and the other guy’s spineless and unmotivated (Professor Oriza). Also, I never expected Katia to become as strong a heroine as she did, so that was another miscalculation. At first, I just imagined her as Shun’s supportive best friend who looks out for him and says things like, “This is dangerous, and you’re getting caught up in some really bad stuff.” But as you know, somewhere along the line, she went and fell in love with Shun! And she was way more forward than I was expecting, too. I guess this is what people mean when they talk about characters developing a mind of their own? It’s like, “Wow, okay, look at you go.” LOL.

Editor: Was there a different girl who might have become the main heroine instead of Katia then?

Baba: If Katia hadn’t turned into such a strong heroine, I was planning for Yuri to be the one who got closest to Shun. Even if she didn’t make it to heroine status, I think she would’ve had more opportunities to show her stuff both as a character and as a potential love interest. Chasing him around with swirly eyes and saying, “Join the Word of God religion! (♡)” That sort of thing. But she sort of faded out of the foreground before she could really show that pushy side, so I feel like I did her dirty. Since she didn’t show up that much, I don’t think I managed to properly convey that “damn, this chick’s scary” kind of feeling. So, between feeling like she could’ve gotten a little more screen time and dropping her from the heroine roster, I do think she got the short end of the stick.

Thank you very much. For every question about the lore, the answers hold so many revelations that make me think, “Now I get it…” or “So that was the intention?!” I want to keep asking more about it, but… Next, I’d like to ask about a few “what-if” scenarios!

Editor: If you were reincarnated as a spider like Kumoko and surrounded by spiders from the second you were born, how do you think you would react? What would you do?

Baba: I probably wouldn’t be able to react at all! I couldn’t handle it! I’d still be standing around, going, “Wuhhh?” until I got eaten. The end. Roll the “YOU DIED” screen. There’s no doubt in my mind. I’d be dead in a matter of moments.

Editor: If you could be reincarnated as any character in the world of the series, who would you want to be? It can be a monster, too.

Baba: Whaaat? I don’t really want to be any of them! If I really had to be reincarnated…I think I’d like to be a background character. Everyone in the story goes through some pretty awful stuff, after all.

Editor: Personally, I wouldn’t mind being in Kusama’s position.

Baba: Kusama certainly does have the easiest position out of any of them. The rest either have really turbulent lives or get put under house arrest in the elf village the whole time.

Editor: If you could have any one skill from the series, which skill would you want?

Baba: After giving it a lot of thought, I think I might pick Exhaustion Nullification. I’m the kind of person who can’t function properly unless I get a lot of sleep, so it’d be nice if I could cut down on the time I spend sleeping so I could work more, y’know?

Editor: Spoken like a true workaholic! LOL.

Continued on Part 2

PINK TIGER

“Shun, I brought a monster encyclopedia. Let’s have a look together, shall we?”

“Thank you, Katia.”

The book Katia brought is a detailed monster guide in gorgeous full color. I sit in the center holding it open, with Katia on my right, Sue on my left, and even Fei peering down from the top of my head.

I’d prefer that she sit on my shoulder instead of my head, but with Katia and Sue resting their chins on each of my shoulders, I guess there’s no room for her anywhere else.

“This encyclopedia contains monsters that live in the jungle that’s closer to the demon territory than the Empire.”

Pleased with herself, Katia explains the book further.

Although Sue and I are part of the royal family, we aren’t given many personal possessions.

In that way, Katia is much more blessed than we are.

So when Katia brings books, tools, and other novelties, it’s rare entertainment for us.

As I flip through the book, I stop abruptly at a certain page.

“Pink?”

“Why, it’s pink.”

Sue and I both voice our surprise.

I can tell Fei is a little taken aback, too, although we’re holding off on Telepathy since Sue is here.

The page in question shows a monster called a Feveroot.

It looks exactly like a tiger and seems to behave like one, too, judging by the description.

It’s agile despite its large size and moves with remarkable grace and stealth, sneaking up on prey in the dense jungle and pouncing unexpectedly.

Its danger level is C, though it says that some individuals may reach a B.

Now, none of that is too surprising.

It’s a tiger. Of course it’s dangerous.

For a tiger monster, even more so.

But why exactly is its body a fluorescent shade of pink?

I don’t quite understand.

“I mean, Earth tigers were orange with black stripes, so is pink really that much weirder?” Katia mutters in Japanese. Is that really a good enough explanation, though?

Maybe the trees in the jungle where the Feveroot lives just so happen to be pink, too?

But there’s no hint of that on any of the other monsters in the encyclopedia. The Feveroot is the only one that’s pink.

“There doesn’t appear to be any explanation as to why it’s pink.”

Although this encyclopedia is quite detailed about the monsters’ battle abilities and how to fight them, it doesn’t say much about their ecology.

I guess if they had time to research that sort of thing, they’d be better off researching ways to defeat them instead.

In the end, we never learned why the Feveroot is pink.

I felt conflicted about the surprising and confusing nature of monsters as I flipped through the pages.

THE LONG-SUFFERING YOUNG LADY’S PAST AND PRESENT

When classes finish for the day, I go back to my dorm room.

Immediately, I toss my bags on the floor and flop face-first onto the bed.

Surely, I’m allowed to be a little sloppy like this once in a while.

It’s not like anyone’s around to see it anyway.

I’m eternally grateful that I have a single room.

Today was exhausting, as usual.

Resisting the urge to just stay in bed and go to sleep right away, I reluctantly drag myself up.

I don’t want to put any creases in my uniform. Besides, if I slept like this, it’d be bad for my skin, and my hair would be an absolute disaster.

Once I catch myself thinking all that, I snort out a laugh at myself.

I’ve really gotten in deep, huh?

In my old life as a man, it never even occurred to me to worry about my skin.

But now, it comes to me as naturally as breathing.

Even though I still retain my memories and thoughts from when I was male, my senses and preferences have shifted in a way that was probably inevitable now that I’ve become female.

Especially since my father is a duke, my family is very prim and proper.

In fact, I’ve been rigorously trained to be a proper young lady from even before a child would normally have that level of awareness.

So maybe it’s not too surprising that Hasebe said she only sees me as feminine now.

“Hmmgh…”

I let out a sigh despite myself.

Why am I the only one who’s the opposite sex now?

Although, considering Fei’s situation, I do think it could’ve been worse.

Male or female, at least I’m still human. That’s luckier than Fei, who got reborn as an earth wyrm and looks exactly like a lizard now.

And as far as luck goes, I was born as the daughter of a duke, the next level of nobility after the royal family. I’ve lived a fairly comfortable life, that’s for sure.

Some other reincarnations started life as abandoned babies, like Yuri.

When I think of it that way, a little change in gender is trivial by comparison.

But even if I understand that logically, it still doesn’t sit right with me.

Depending on how you look at it, even being a duke’s daughter is more of a burden than anything.

The real reason I’m so in my head about this today is that a guy flirted with me.

He’s a prince from another kingdom.

I mean, he’s the second son, and the kingdom is pretty small, so it’s not like he’s got tons of power.

So I flat-out rejected him. Not like he has enough influence to make a whole international incident out of it.

The only problem is that this isn’t the first time it’s happened.

I hate to brag, but I’m honestly kind of gorgeous.

And I should know since I’m speaking with a former male gaze.

On top of that, I’m the daughter of a duke, and I’ve got some of the highest stats of anyone our age, even if Shun’s are higher.

Setting aside my personality, you couldn’t ask for a better catch.

So, knowing things would end up like this, I’ve done my best to act like the least desirable woman imaginable.

I treat men as coldly as I can, and I do my best not to associate with other women, either.

I keep my friendships to a minimum, sticking close to Shun and company as often as possible.

And even after all that, some guys still try to flirt with me.

Plus, I’m constantly gracing Shun with my presence to keep other women off his back, but I’m sure there will still be some who try to get close to him eventually.

I’m sure Sue would have some choice words about that, though. And even though I’m mostly just doing it to protect Shun from women trying to flirt with him, people still complain that I’m a vixen hogging the prince for myself.

Even though I figured all this would happen, it still kind of hurts to have other people hate you.

Especially when Shun is just waltzing along with no idea what I’m going through for his sake.

Ugh, it drives me nuts.

What’s he gonna do if some girl manages to slip past me and Sue and confesses her undying love to him or something?

He wouldn’t just go along with it to be nice… Would he?

When I imagine a situation like that, I feel a weird jabbing pain in my chest.

What the hell?

…Nope, better not to think about it.

Don’t give me any of that love or romance crap.

Especially if they’re only saying it because of my position.

“I think it’s insulting to confess to someone when you don’t actually even like them.”

Someone once said that to me.

It was in my old life, right after the one and only time I made a confession to someone.

She was basically the idol of the school, and I confessed, knowing I would get rejected.

Sure enough, she turned me down, but what she said afterward really impacted me.

It’s true: I only confessed to her to fit in with the other guys.

She saw right through me, shot me down, and looked at me with the coldest eyes I’ve ever seen.

Now I think I understand how she felt, at least a little bit.

Not that me understanding that changes anything in the slightest.

Since I’m a noble, I’ll probably have to get married eventually.

Probably to some guy I don’t even like, regardless of what I want.

Since I used to be a guy and all, I don’t feel confident that I can love a man, even now that I’ve been reborn as a woman.

My only choice is a marriage of convenience, with no feelings involved.

I’m sure I’ll go my whole life without ever knowing what love actually feels like.

All I can do is hope that the guy I get married off to is a good, honest person.

A TASTE OF HOME

Right after the entrance ceremony, Ms. Oka sent for all of us.

Since it was a gathering just for the reincarnations, we kept it a secret from Sue and snuck out of the dorms.

When Fei and I reached the meeting place, everyone else was already there.

“Looks like the gang’s all heeere.”

“Ms. Oka, what was the point of calling us all out like this?”

At the demand from Natsume, now known as Hugo, our former teacher just beams and holds something out for us to see.

“Ta-daaa!”

It’s a weird black blob in a bag.

The substance looks sort of sticky, with an odd black luster to it.

“Um… Ms. Oka, what is that?”

Katia sounds a little perturbed.

Something about the substance is disturbing, at least based on appearance alone.

But it surely can’t be anything bad since Ms. Oka held it out to us so happily…

“Weeell, believe it or not…it’s miso. That’s whaaat!”

Wait, seriously?!

My gaze is drawn to the mysterious substance—rather, the miso paste.

Everyone else’s eyes are equally glued to it.

We can’t help ourselves.

This is a different world, not Earth. None of the ingredients we were accustomed to in Japan exist here.

There are some vegetables and such with similarities, to some extent, but nothing that’s exactly the same as the foods we used to love.

Not to mention, human culture in this world isn’t very advanced due to the ongoing war against the demons.

That means agriculture hasn’t developed very much, either, and there are only limited varieties of vegetables, grains, and so on.

To be perfectly honest, the result is that food in this world barely has any flavor.

I wouldn’t say it’s bad. It just can’t compare to the food in Japan, where you could eat cuisine from all over the world.

And now, suddenly, we’re face to face with miso paste.

Miso is one of the core components of Japanese food, right up there with rice and soy sauce.

So, of course, we’re all immediately transfixed.

“It’s not perfect miso paste, of cooourse. Just something that tastes very much like it.”

Yeah, that makes sense.

I’m sure soybeans don’t exist in this world.

And even if they did, there’d be no guarantee you could make miso.

I don’t know all the details of how miso is made, but I think I remember it being a fairly complicated and time-consuming process.

“I stumbled upon this while I was traveling all over the world, you knooow. It’s made in a very small village, and they eat it all on their own, so they don’t produce much to be sooold. But I pulled some strings and managed to get some for all of yooou.”

I see. That would explain why we never found it before.

“Which is whyyy…I made miso soup for everyone!”

With that, Ms. Oka produces a big pot from behind her back.

Wherever she was hiding that thing, I’m incredibly grateful for her generous efforts.

Our teacher produces a bunch of bowls from nowhere, just like the pot, and starts pouring the miso soup into them.

The other main ingredient is a vegetable that tastes like daikon.

Even though it looks more like a brownish carrot, the taste is much closer to a radish.

“My family always made miso soup with seaweed and daikon…,” Yuri murmurs quietly.

“Ours depended on the day, but deep-fried tofu was my favorite.”

“We never really did miso soup that much, I’d say.”

“My family did it a lot of different ways, too, same as Katia. We always included green onion, though.”

We never skipped the green onion, no matter what else went into the soup.

“What about you, Natsume?”

“We did…pork miso soup, mostly.”

“Oooh.” Everyone in the group nods.

Pork miso soup was great, too.

Once everyone has bowls, Ms. Oka passes out chopsticks.

It’s been ages since I held chopsticks, too.

“All right, time to eeeat!”

At Ms. Oka’s prompting, we all start eating the miso soup.

It’s kind of gritty.

The whole thing has a grainy quality, like the miso hasn’t quite dissolved all the way.

On top of that, the flavor is too strong.

The taste of the miso is so overpowering, I can’t even tell if there’s dashi broth in it or not.

It’s nothing like the miso soup I ate in Japan, to be totally honest.

When it comes down to it, this is still just an imitation, not real miso at all.

But in spite of all that, it still somehow contains a hint of the taste of my homeland, a taste I had almost forgotten.

“Mmf… Hic… Hmm…”

Looking up, I see tears streaming down Yuri’s face as she takes small sips of the miso soup.

Like she’s trying to savor it, even though it’s not delicious by any means.

Katia starts sniffling, too, maybe set off by Yuri’s crying.

Even Hugo, who would normally have something insulting to say at a time like this, stays quiet as he eats his soup.

“Thank you for the meal.”

And soon, the pot was drained of every last drop of miso soup.

LUCKY LECHER

I have a skill called Divine Protection.

It’s a strange but convenient skill that supposedly makes it easier to gain the results the user desires in any situation.

To be honest, I hardly ever notice the blessings of this skill in action in my daily life.

After all, it’s hard to tell whether the skill was at work behind any given outcome.

Even if I am blessed with some good fortune, I don’t know if I have that skill to thank or not.

Maybe I would see its real worth in action if I were ever in a life-threatening situation or something along those lines.

But so far, it doesn’t feel that way since I usually have to get by with my own strength somehow.

If anything, I guess it’s possible that this skill was responsible for Ms. Oka running over with such perfect timing when Hugo nearly killed me. But again, I have no way of knowing for sure.

So, in my mind, the only value of this skill is that I’m a little luckier than the average person.

However, there is one recurring trend that I strongly suspect is the work of this skill.

Rather, I can’t think of any other explanation.

If you’ll forgive me for the sudden question, have you ever heard of the phrase “lucky lecher”?

There’s a Japanese term for when someone ends up in a lewd situation through sheer coincidence or serendipity.

You’ll see it happen to the protagonists of harem manga and anime pretty often, for instance.

Being a red-blooded male myself, I did read that sort of manga in my own life, and I may have occasionally envied those protagonists a little.

Of course, it’s still just fiction. At the time, I figured I would never end up in a situation like that myself.

Emphasis on figured, in the past tense.

As you may have guessed from that, I’ve been having these “lucky lecher” moments all the time in my current life.

Like when a mischievous gust of wind blows up a girl’s skirt and gives me a peek at her panties.

Or when it starts raining out of nowhere and I get an eyeful of a girl whose clothes are soaked through to the point of being transparent.

Or when I walk into a classroom only to run into a girl who’s changing clothes in there for some reason.

Or when I try to catch a girl who’s tripped and fallen in front of me, only to accidentally grab her chest in the process.

There are plenty of other examples, to the point where I’d run out of space if I tried to list them all.

This level of “lucky lecher” encounters can’t be normal.

I never once experienced something like this in my old life. And now it happens constantly.

In some cases, they’re coming on to me on purpose.

I am technically a prince of a major kingdom, after all. That’s reason enough for some girls to try and win me over.

But Katia usually fends them off for me, preventing girls like that from getting too close.

While I don’t mind so much when they’re doing it of their own accord, most of the cases are fully unintentional for all parties involved.

I’m certainly not trying to do these things on purpose, and the girls in question clearly didn’t want me to see them in such a ridiculous state, either.

Let me be clear.

The reason they can get away with “lucky lecher” stuff in fiction is because it’s played for laughs.

When it happens to you in real life, it’s just incredibly awkward.

If the girls got angry and slapped me like a manga scene, and that was the end of it… Well, I’d honestly prefer it that way.

But since I’m a prince of an important kingdom, of course they can’t slap me…

It’d be considered treason, so all the poor girls can do is quietly curb their dismay.

Like Hugo, a few of them are royalty from kingdoms that are as important as or more important than ours, but those cases are incredibly rare. Most of these girls rank lower than me in social standing.

So not only can they definitely not slap me, but they can’t even complain about it, especially when it’s clear that I’m not doing it on purpose.

Have you ever seen a girl hold back tears as she runs away from you in silence? It feels awful.

So my theory is that these “lucky lecher” situations arose due to my Divine Protection skill.

It happens way too often to be a coincidence, and on top of that, it always fades quietly without anyone spreading negative rumors about me.

Even when I obviously don’t have any ill intent, you would think that people would start to talk when it happens this often. Yet somehow, there are no signs of that happening thus far.

It would break my heart if people were whispering, “Prince Schlain is a pervert!” behind my back, but I haven’t heard even a hint of rumors like that, so I’m fairly sure it’s not happening… At least, I certainly hope not.

Even with all of this evidence for my theory—bordering on irrefutable proof, really—the only thing that stops me from being certain is this: Divine Protection is supposed to make it easier to attain the user’s desired results.

In other words, if this really is the work of the Divine Protection skill, that would mean that deep down in my heart, I want the “lucky lecher” situations to happen, and those poor girls are the victims of that.

The thought makes me feel horribly guilty.

And yet these “lucky lecher” situations still haven’t stopped.

I can only assume, with a great deal of stomach pain, that this means a young man’s lust is a truly insatiable thing.

If anyone ever found out about this, especially someone like Sue or Katia… The thought alone terrifies me.

They’d be glaring daggers at me for a while, even if they hopefully wouldn’t hate me forever.

In Sue’s case, I suspect she would start to blame the girls instead of me, which is terrifying in its own way.

As for Katia, since she used to be a guy in our old lives, she’d understand where I’m coming from… At least, I sure hope so.

Yuri would probably start giving me a Word of God lecture.

Ms. Oka would just get mad at me in classic teacher fashion, I bet. She’d sit me down and read me the riot act.

Oh, and Fei? She already knows.

Before she evolved, she spent a lot of time riding on my shoulder, so she naturally wound up in a lot of those situations with me.

I’ll never forget the intense side-eye she gave me that day…

At any rate, I’ve got to fix this “lucky lecher” nature of mine somehow before it starts some weird rumors and my close friends find out about it. It can only end in disaster.

Begone, impure desires! I fervently wish every day, even as I run into yet another accident.

GOBLINS

“What’re you looking at, Shun?”

“Oh, hey, Katia. It’s a monster encyclopedia.”

“Ah, got it. The kind that describes monsters’ habits and skills and stuff, right?”

“Yeah, exactly. I figured I would do some research on the monsters that live in the area we’re going to on our next class expedition.”

“Okay, nerd. The ones that show up in the place we’re going to would be listed here, here, and here.”

“See, you already know your stuff! Doesn’t that mean you researched it already?”

“I just spend a lot of time looking through books like these, that’s all. I happened to have read this one before, nothing to do with the trip.”

“Oh yeah, you had that complete book of skills, too, didn’t you?”

“Right, right. It’s just kinda fun looking through that sort of thing, you know?”

“Yeah, I get what you mean.”

“But sometimes, there are parts that are like, ‘Come on, that can’t be right.’”

“Like what?”

“Goblins.”

“Ah, yeah…”

“It’s like, why do the goblins in this world have such a high danger level?! It just seems wrong! Goblins are supposed to be the basic trash mobs that newbie adventurers beat to level up early on, right?!”

“Yeah, for sure. In the stories and games we knew, goblins definitely didn’t have a reputation for being strong.”

“If they were just strong here, that’d be fine.”

“Would it?”

“You know, like a ‘goblin king.’ Goblins are weak, and there are lots of them, but once in a while, there’s a really strong evolved one, right? So it still wouldn’t be so bad if there were some strong ones.”

“Oh, like when the goblins start coordinating their movements, and it turns out there was a goblin king commanding them? That was a fun story trope.”

“Right? So it’s fine if they’re strong. But why do the goblins in this world have some kind of Bushido-like warrior’s code situation?!”

“True, I guess you normally think of goblins as being not very bright…”

“So what’s up with this encyclopedia’s description?! It says they’re the most warriorlike of all monsters and devote themselves to the art of war from the moment they’re born!”

“Definitely doesn’t read like a description of goblins.”

“Do you have any idea how I felt when I was reading an epic adventure novel not long ago and a goblin showed up as the protagonist’s lifelong rival?!”

“Ah, I think I might’ve read that one, too.”

“It was a fun read and all, but a goblin? Really? A super-cool goblin, yeah. But still!”

“Yeah, that goblin really was awesome.”

“The hero defeated him in the end. Except even in death, the goblin still didn’t fall. The hero is kneeling in exhaustion, and the dead goblin is still standing. It’s like the winner and loser have had their roles reversed. That was a crazy cool scene, all right. And the whole final battle was awesome. But still… a goblin?!”

“By the way, I heard that novel was based on a true story.”

“Wait, for real?”

“For real. I guess an actual adventurer had a fight to the death like that with a goblin.”

“Seriously, what is up with the goblins in this world?!”

“They don’t really seem that different from the ones we knew, though.”

“They’re completely different!”

“Well, they multiply quickly, so there are a lot of them. They grow quickly, although their lifespans are short unless they evolve. Their stats are on the low side. And they don’t have any special skills. See? If you list off their traits, it doesn’t sound so different.”

“I think you’re skipping a few key details there!”

“Maybe it’s just an internal shift. Goblins in most of our old world’s fiction seemed stupid, but in this world, goblins are warriors with an unshakeable will. That’s probably the biggest difference.”

“And that’s how you get a warrior tribe feared even by adventurers, huh?”

“They’re not that strong on their own. But even with their low stats, they work together in groups to attack stronger enemies. And since they’re experienced in battle, they have impressive fighting prowess in spite of their low stats.”

“So they cover for their lack of stats and skills with fighting techniques and teamwork, huh? It’s like, are you guys the protagonists now or what?”

“I’ve heard there’s a kingdom somewhere whose knights follow the ‘Way of the Goblin.’”

“What the hell kind of way is that? No, actually, I can kind of guess.”

“You face mortality like a goblin, hone your strengths like a goblin, and live with pride like a goblin.”

“That really doesn’t sound like a goblin at all, does it?”

“But that’s how goblins in this world are.”

“It makes no sense!”

“Just accept it. The goblins we knew were only fiction in the first place.”

“I dunno. I still don’t like it!”

“By the way, I heard there’s a goblin settlement near where we’re going on the expedition…”

“C’mon, man, don’t jinx us like that.”

“I’m just kidding. It’s actually pretty far away, and the local adventurers are always keeping an eye on things, so I’m sure no goblins will find their way to us.”

“I’m telling you, don’t jinx it!”

“It’ll be fine. You worry too much, Katia.”

At that time, even Katia couldn’t have seriously predicted that Shun would end up locked in a life-or-death battle with a single goblin by the end of the expedition.

A GIRL’S INDISPENSABLE SKILL

It’s been many years now since I was reborn in this world as a girl.

At this point, I’ve nearly forgotten what it felt like to be a boy.

At first, I was frequently confused by the differences between living as a male or a female. But now that I’ve lived as a woman for about as long as I was a man in my old life, I have to admit I’ve gotten used to it.

One major factor in this adjustment is that Fei has been around since I was young.

Despite what she looks like now, Fei was a girl in her old life, and she’s given me a lot of advice.

I think it was a big help that she warned me about what to expect, so I was ready when I hit puberty and my body really started changing in a way I’d never experienced.

But there are still some differences between how things worked in our old world and this new one, so Fei hasn’t been able to help me there.

There’s a major gap in technological development between the two worlds. Whatever tools exist in this world, they’re always less advanced than what we had in our old lives.

For instance, Fei’s recommendations for makeup aren’t much help when a lot of it doesn’t exist here.

All I can do is find the next best thing that exists in this world.

When Fei watched me struggle with all this and said, “Whew, must be tough,” like it wasn’t her problem, I may have casually wanted to throttle her a little.

But just as there are things that existed in the old world and not this one, there’s one thing that exists in this world and not the old one.

I’m talking about skills.

And there’s one skill in particular that any girl will want to acquire no matter what.

It’s called Odorless.

As the name implies, it negates smells.

To be clear, this isn’t a trivial matter of being worried about body odor.

No, I suppose that is part of it, but there’s a bigger, inevitable issue here.

An issue that could be a literal matter of life or death to a young woman.

See, there are a lot of different skills in this world.

These skills get polished even in the course of day-to-day life, and there are a lot of skills that most people will naturally acquire and improve over the years.

Among them is one skill that could be called the enemy of women everywhere.

Its name is Olfactory Enhancement.

As the name implies, it makes your sense of smell stronger.

When I put it that way, you’d probably think it doesn’t sound like a big deal, right?

But you’d be dead wrong about that.

This skill is terrifying.

Why, you ask?

Because people who have honed this skill can use it to pick up on private information about other people.

Do you understand how scary that is?

When the Olfactory Enhancement skill levels up enough, you can glean more details from someone else’s scent.

I’m talking about being able to pick up on when they’ve been to the bathroom and even when it’s their time of the month.

Now, that might not be so bad if that information were revealed to a perfect gentleman.

But as a former guy myself, I can tell you right now that the very concept of a “perfect gentleman” is a myth.

If anything, there’s a lot more gentlemen of the creepy “m’lady” variety.

Even if they’re not a total creep, most girls would still find it unbearable for some random guy to gain that information.

Are they trying to humiliate us or what?

Really, just the thought of some guy smelling me gives me the creeps.

So it’s all but mandatory for a girl to get the Odorless skill as soon as possible.

There’s even a sort of health class that is separated by gender, with a curriculum for girls about gaining the skill.

If anything, girls who don’t have the Odorless skill tend to get weird looks.

They practically get treated like perverts, to be perfectly honest.

Now, anyone well-off enough to go to the academy will have the Odorless skill without exception.

Even around town, you probably wouldn’t find any women without it unless their circumstances are highly unusual.

That’s how important it is.

And so women in this world live their lives with their scent neutralized.

Maybe that’s why there isn’t much in the way of perfumes.

Incidentally, it’s still generally considered best for boys to have the Odorless skill, too, if not as urgently as girls.

Nobody wants to come back from the bathroom and be told they stink, regardless of gender, right?

It sounds like the kind of thing a grade-school kid would say to be mean, but in this world, people really would be able to smell it.

I’m sure you can imagine what a pain Olfactory Enhancement would be, even just in everyday life.

Just breathing in through your nose counts as smelling, so you slowly but surely build up proficiency whether you’re trying to or not.

The same thing happens with Auditory Enhancement, which means you end up being able to hear other people’s heartbeats and stuff.

While that’s not as bad as smelling, a lot of people in noble society still acquire the Silence skill so that other people can’t tell anything from their heart rate.

Apparently, there are even high-level techniques where people deliberately let others hear their heartbeats to convey their emotions.

Mostly to indirectly confess their love and that kind of thing.

From what I’ve heard, you can turn off your Odorless skill at times like that for extra effect, too.

So the other person can tell you like them from the smell of your sweat or whatever.

I bet it has to do with picking up hormones by scent, probably.

I tried it in front of Shun once, but he just said, “Hey, your skill’s off,” like he was casually being helpful.

Ugh, he’s so dense.

Okina Baba Q&A Interview Part 2

I had a lot of trouble with Volume 11, where Julius is the main character.

Next, we’ll ask some questions about the characters.

Editor: Who is the number one character you feel most attached to?

Baba: The protagonist. I’ve been writing her the longest, I suppose, and I continue to write mainly from her point of view. She’s just the number one character altogether, really.

Editor: Which character is the easiest to write?

Baba: That would be the protagonist, too.

Editor: And which character is the hardest to write?

Baba: There are actually quite a few. Especially…if I had to narrow it down to the very hardest, I would say Julius and Dustin. Julius is tough because I have to write him as cool as possible. Since he’s also Shun’s role model, he has to be an extremely cool hero, the kind that a high school boy who reincarnated from Japan would admire. He’s just too high-ranking a character, so I struggled with how to make him cool enough. Because of that, I had a lot of trouble with Volume 11, where Julius is the main character. I wanted to show him working hard as the leading role for a whole book because it’s that strength and personality that must have made Julius’s death shocking and devastating to the people of that world. But how do you depict a hero among heroes, the kind of superhero whose death would be that shocking? That’s what made him so difficult.

Editor: What about Dustin?

Baba: Dustin is just too damn smart! LOL. It’s very difficult to think like a hyper-intelligent person. Dustin himself has a tendency to think too much, and he’s brilliant, too… As an author, you should never introduce a character who’s smarter than you are, I suppose. There were a lot of times when I thought that Dustin would probably have a better, more elaborate plan; normal people can see one step ahead at best, but he can see ten or even a hundred steps ahead and acts accordingly, so it was tough to decide what sort of actions he should take. Since he’s already so resolved, it’s easy enough to write his feelings, but deciding on his course of action was very hard.

Editor: Which character would you most want to be friends with?

Baba: That’s a tough one, but…I think Natsume before the reincarnation might be fun to hang out with. He’d probably be a bit obnoxious at times, though. I mean, after the reincarnation, Hugo’s obnoxiousness kind of explodes… As far as characters who haven’t shown up in the story, I think Sakurazaki would make a great friend. He’s good at reading the room, for one thing.

Editor: Which character would you most want to marry?

Baba: I’m not sure it would be wise to marry any of them, you know…? LOL. Even putting aside the matter of interpersonal relationships and such, when you think about their personalities alone…I suppose Ms. Oka would be the safest bet. She’s got the most common sense out of any of them. And everyone else is hiding some kind of red flag or other… LOL. In that regard, I guess Kusama doesn’t have any red flags, either. When you think about it that way, marrying Kusama might actually be a pretty great option. You wouldn’t have to work too hard or end up in too serious a position…

Continued on Part 3

DECLUTTERING

“We’re going to have to sort out this mess.”

I can’t help but groan as I look up at the mountain of stuff piled haphazardly before me.

“Ariel. This is everything that had piled up in Space Storage. I don’t believe I missed anything, but when it wakes up, be sure to double-check.”

“Mm’kay. Thanks.”

I nod at Gülie in appreciation for all his help.

I asked him to recover everything White had stored in a separate dimension.

And I only knew to do that because Gülie told me that White had become a god and would no longer be able to use her skills.

Without her skills, White wouldn’t be able to access the stuff she had stored in other dimensions.

And her hoard included a great deal of food and supplies that she was keeping safe for us.

If Gülie hadn’t graciously accepted my request and recovered it all for us, we might’ve been in real trouble.

But it turns out she had way more stuff stored than I thought.

While I do have the Spatial Magic skill, it’s not high enough for me to use Space Storage.

If we were going to lug this whole mountain of stuff along with us, we’d probably need several horse-drawn carriages.

I do think it’s inevitable that we’d need at least one carriage for all our things, but I’d prefer to keep it to just one if at all possible.

“Oh well. We’ll just have to toss some of it.”

Let the decluttering festival begin!

“Listen up, team! We’re going to tackle this mountain of stuff and sort out what to keep and what to toss!”

We better take care of it while we’re waiting for White to wake up.

I send Merazophis to the nearest town to do some necessary shopping; everyone else will be on cleaning duty with me.

First, sorting out the food takes top priority.

A lot of stuff that would’ve lasted a long time in White’s Space Storage will go bad quickly if we’re storing it out here.

We’ll just have to use it all up in order of what will go bad the fastest.

Next in importance are any tools necessary for travel.

We’ll have to hang on to anything that we can’t afford to get rid of, naturally.

Thus far, the tidying has been going smoothly enough.

It’s this next part that’ll be a problem.

“Sophia, do we really need to keep all those luxury items?”

“What? Of course we do.”

Sophia keeps sorting all of the books, weapons, and other objects both heavy and unwieldly into the “keep” pile without a second thought.

I always bought books when she asked because they’re educational, and we’ve collected a lot of different weapons so she can easily choose what she’ll eventually use as her main weapon.

But that was all under the assumption that White would keep it all in Space Storage for us. Now that we don’t have access to that anymore, I’d like to get rid of as many bulky items as possible.

Besides, she’s read all of the books at least once, and she usually doesn’t use the weapons again once she’s tested them out one time.

We only kept them because Sophia likes looking at them; she’s not actually going to use any of them.

And yet she’s decided we need to keep them all?

See, this is the problem with nobles.

“Fiel. Do you really need that mountain of clothes?”

Fiel tilts her head at me with an expression that seems to say, What is this idiot talking about?

She’s putting an awful lot of clothes in the “keep” pile.

Along with White, she’s spent all of her free time making tons of clothes.

It’s enough to fill a small carriage’s luggage area to the brim, and she wants us to take all of it.

If it were everyone’s clothes, that would be one thing, but all of that is just Fiel’s.

You’re clearly over max capacity there, kiddo.

“Riel. What are all of those mysterious objects, exactly?”

There’s a pile of items in front of Riel, and… Yeah, I genuinely have no idea what they are.

What…what is that? Why?

Whatever it is, just toss it, please. Bye.

“Ael. It’s no use trying to hide those things from me, okay?”

Ael is clearly trying to smuggle away as many unneeded things as she can carry.

She turns away with an expression that says, Busted, huh?

“As for you, Sael… Okay. We’re good here, just keep an eye on White for me. If she wakes up, come get us, all right?”

Sael was frozen in place, unable to distinguish between things to keep and things to toss, so I let her off the hook from this particular task.

But still… Hmm.

Really, none of them are very good at tidying up.

Oh well. I guess it’s time for me to break out the iron fist.

“We’re decluttering, got it? This is a necessary evil.”

“What?! You want to throw this and this away?!”

I do another round of elimination from the “keep” piles that Sophia and the others made.

All of Sophia’s books and weapons are getting sold off.

Books are rare and highly valuable, and weapons will fetch a good price, too, since they’re necessities.

We’ll sell the majority of the clothes, too.

Since they’re made with top-quality Divine Thread, they’d be worth so much as to be almost priceless in normal circumstances. However, these ones are for children and thus not in very high demand, so we’ll just sell them off for cheap.

Riel’s pile of mystery objects… Yeah, we’re just gonna toss all those.

I keep plowing through the piles, pushing past the weeping and wailing little girls.

Sometimes, you just have to be the bad guy and teach kids that no means no.

GOD SCYTHE

“Magic swords.”

Two little words that would make any teenage nerd’s heart flutter, don’t you think?

Well, it just so happens that magic swords actually exist in this world.

Really, it’s a blanket term for any weapon with a special effect.

These magic swords can be broadly divided into two categories.

One is the kind that has been given a specific effect with the power of a skill.

Skills like Magic Conferment and Ability Conferment can attach a permanent effect to a weapon, turning it into a magic sword.

However, those skills are incredibly difficult to practice, so there are very few people who can use them and very few magic swords made through this method.

Usually, the phrase “magic sword” would call to mind the other category.

Weapons made using materials from an especially strong monster sometimes inherit a power based on the monster’s abilities in life.

This is the other kind of magic sword.

And by that definition, I technically have a magic sword, too.

It’s my scythe, essentially my other half.

Originally, I made it out of a scythe blade from one of the front legs of my spider lower half back when I was an Arachne.

In other words, it’s made with materials from a strong monster: yours truly.

Now, I’m told that monsters have something called a “danger level.” Any monster that’s danger level C or above has a chance of resulting in a magic sword, and when you use materials from a monster that’s danger level A or higher, you’re almost guaranteed to get one.

Incidentally, my danger level was “legendary-class,” as in too high to properly rank.

So I guess it was inevitable that using materials from my body would make a magic sword.

As a result, my scythe turned into a way crazier piece of work than I expected.

It had the Rot and Dark attributes, for starters.

That was a pretty spooky combo for a pure white weapon.

If you’re wondering why I’m saying this in the past tense, it’s because when I turned into a god, my scythe got caught in the deification process and transformed, too.

Now my scythe is impossible to appraise.

Which means it’s considered outside of the system, just like me.

Of course, magic swords have their special effects thanks to the system.

So if the system no longer applies, they lose their special effects and become a normal weapon.

At least, that’s what you’d think…

But the scythe in my hands has a white glow, the elegance of which is diminished somewhat by the extremely creepy black aura surrounding it.

Yep. This is definitely not normal!

But even though it’s clear as day that this scythe isn’t normal, I still have no idea what its powers actually are.

If it were a magic sword within the system, you could just Appraise it and find out what abilities are attached to it, but now that it’s not part of the system, Appraising it doesn’t do squat.

And if you’re thinking I should just try it and find out, I’m gonna stop you right there. It’s not that simple, pal.

Now that I’m a god, I don’t even know how to use my own powers.

So do you really think I’d be able to control the powers of this scythe? Even if it is my other half, made out of my own body, it’s clearly its own separate thing now.

When I tried swinging it around a few times, nothing happened anyway.

Even if I put all my strength into it, still nothing.

All that happened is I got really tired. Ooof.

Hrmmm. The aura doesn’t show up unless I’m holding it, so it’s clearly got some kind of hidden power going on…

By the way, I thought about having someone else try to use it for me, and they all flat-out rejected that idea.

“I don’t want to get cursed, thank you very much.”

“Yeah, my Danger Perception goes off the charts when I look at that thing. I might die if I try to use it, seriously.”

Vampy got real evasive, and the demon lord responded so seriously that, of course, I couldn’t try to push her into it.

And the puppet spiders all started shaking their heads like crazy as soon as they made eye contact.

Mera, on the other hand, looked so grimly determined that I decided not to let him do it, either.

Fair enough, though. Its aura does kind of seem like you might get cursed.

If I let Mera try it and he actually died for real, my guilty conscience keeping me up at night would be the least of my problems.

Still, I’m really curious about its powers.

So when I have spare time and stamina, I’ve been swinging it around some more.

Thanks to that, I learned that it definitely does have powers, although I still don’t know what they are exactly.

What I mean is, I got a little glimpse of its power somehow.

Like when I swung it and almost staggered and fell, or when it slipped out of my hands and went flying.

The times I almost fell, it either dragged me back up to my feet somehow or destroyed whatever obstacles I would’ve landed on in the process.

Yeah, that’s right. I’ve almost fallen more than a few times now!

Don’t you dare underestimate my total lack of athletic prowess!

And the times it slipped out of my hands, it came back without me having to do anything.

Sometimes, it flies back like a boomerang, and other times, it just pops back up in my hand like it teleported there.

That’s right. It’s slipped out of my hands more than a few times, too!

So, to sum it up, I’ve confirmed that it’s got some special powers for sure.

But it doesn’t seem like I can will those powers to activate, and I still don’t really know the extent of what it can do.

For the most part, the powers seem to activate when it senses that I’m in danger…except I dunno. They’re different every time.

Also, when I let go of it, it seems to come back on its own.

Which made me wonder what would happen if I tried to leave it somewhere, buuut as soon as that thought crossed my mind, its aura flared up like it was mad at me.

Come on, I was just joking. I’d never leave my other half behind! Ha-ha…ha…

TOOTHBRUSHING

Teeth are a vampire’s life.

I know it sounds like a catchphrase for a toothpaste commercial or something.

If you’re wondering why this sentence popped into my head all of a sudden, I suppose it might be due to a little betrayal I experienced recently.

You see, it all started when I asked White a question I’ve been wondering for a while.

The question: Don’t you want to brush your teeth?

As far as I know, White never brushes her teeth.

But no one else would bother questioning that.

Why? Because the concept of toothbrushing doesn’t exist in this world in the first place.

My baby teeth grew in early, perhaps because I’m a vampire.

At the time, I assumed toothbrushing was soon to follow, yet not a single person brushed my teeth for me as a baby.

When I asked Merazophis about it years later, his genuine response was, “What is that, young miss?”

As it turns out, nobody brushes their teeth in this world.

In fact, it seems like cavities don’t even exist here.

In my old life, I learned on television that cavities come about when bacteria produce acid that causes tooth decay, and there is a tiny percentage of individuals who don’t get that specific bacteria.

So those people just don’t get cavities.

I guess the bacteria that cause cavities just don’t exist in this world, so nobody gets them at all.

And if you’re not going to get cavities, there’s no need to brush your teeth.

Which is why the practice of toothbrushing doesn’t exist.

But since I was diligent about brushing my teeth twice a day in my old life, it feels strange not to do it at all, you know?

Not that I can anyway, since toothbrushes don’t exist here.

Just to make myself feel a little better, I’ve gotten into the habit of gargling after each meal.

Since I learned Water Magic, I can even produce water for it.

And then, when Merazophis saw me doing that, he started copying me.

“So this was a ritual in the world you came from, young miss? It has never occurred to me to think about the health of my teeth.”

For some reason, he seemed very impressed.

I guess it must be novel to people from this world—they don’t need to worry about their dental hygiene.

Besides, even in the unlikely event that something did happen to one of your teeth, you could just fix it with Healing Magic.

Goodness, magic really is convenient.

You never get cavities, and if you chip or break a tooth, you can just magically fix it. No wonder it never occurred to them to go to all the trouble of brushing their teeth.

But since I’m so accustomed to doing it, it feels strange to me if I don’t.

When I explain this to residents of this world, like Merazophis or Miss Ariel, of course, they can’t relate.

Which is why I brought it up to White, who’s theoretically the one person who would understand.

I thought it might have occurred to her once she became an Arachne, if not so much when she was a spider monster.

But she betrayed my hopes by tilting her head and staring at me with a look of genuine bewilderment.

Now, it’s nothing new that she didn’t answer me. But I was so confused about why she was confused that I tilted my head and stared right back.

Then, after a very long silence, she finally responded.

“I’ve never brushed my teeth.”

“Right, of course not. I’ve certainly never seen you do it. But we did it every day in our old lives, right? So doesn’t it feel strange not to do it at all? It always makes me feel antsy after a meal. You know what I mean?”

Since she answered me for once, I continued the conversation.

I suppose I may have gotten a little overexcited since our conversations usually end with White ignoring me.

Besides, I was happy that someone would finally be able to sympathize with my plight.

And yet White posed as if she were at a loss for some reason, then eventually shook her head.

“What? You don’t understand? Doesn’t it feel gross not to brush your teeth?”

I really thought she’d relate to my feelings.

You can understand why I’d be disappointed.

“I know that people in this world supposedly don’t get cavities, but still, doesn’t it seem unsanitary to skip toothbrushing entirely? What if something gets stuck in your teeth? I couldn’t possibly just ignore it. And I feel like my breath will smell awful if I don’t do anything.”

Even if you don’t have to worry about getting cavities, you could still get bits of food stuck between your teeth and such.

Which is why I’d really like to brush my teeth if I could, not just gargle.

But despite my efforts to voice my feelings as a common complaint, White just shook her head again.

“What is it? You think it would be better not to brush our teeth or something?”

At this point, I was getting annoyed by White’s reaction, and my tone came out a little sharper.

This time, White flapped her hand.

“Not that.”

“What in the world is it then?”

White fell silent again, as if she were tired of answering my questions.

Just as I was getting fed up, assuming this would end the same as all the others, she drew a breath resolutely and opened her mouth.

“I didn’t brush my teeth in my old life, either. Because I was immune to cavities.”

I’m guessing my expression upon hearing this must have looked utterly idiotic, with my mouth hanging wide open.

That’s right. Even back on Earth, there was a tiny percentage of humans who didn’t have the bacteria that would cause cavities.

I couldn’t believe that White was one of those people.

Here I thought we’d be able to share our attachment to a ritual from our old lives, and then it turns out that White was more like the people of this world than me. Isn’t that just awful?

That day, after being thus betrayed, I gargled even more fervently than usual.

MUSHROOM HUNTING

“Let us set forth on the hunt, good White.”

The demon lord invited me out with some really weird energy.

She drags me out hunting like this sometimes.

Usually, she’s after some delicious monster that only exists in this particular area or something like that.

So I’m normally more than willing to accept her invitation.

But this time, something is strange.

The demon lord’s attitude seems different than usual, and I don’t just mean the weird tone.

Normally, it’s very casual. Like, “Wanna go have some fun?” But this time she seems extremely intense.

“Our quarry today is much more dangerous than usual. We must proceed with caution, White.”

What?

The demon lord—the demon lord—is saying this monster is dangerous?

As far as I know, only an outlier on the level of an administrator can even come close to being stronger than the demon lord.

Meaning the demon lord is practically the strongest being in this whole world.

And she’s saying this monster is “dangerous”?

What kind of beast could it be?

I follow the demon lord with great trepidation, and soon she leads us to a mountain.

The place is lush with greenery and, overall, has a sort of tranquil vibe.

Yeah, this is already weird.

Hmm? What’s weird about that? Well, you’ve gotta remember this world is crawling with monsters.

A mountain is a surefire place to find tons of them.

Most mountains are teeming with monster presence, which doesn’t exactly make for a tranquil atmosphere.

“Heh-heh. I see you’ve already noticed the oddity of this mountain.”

The demon lord wears an inappropriate grin as she gazes intently at the mountain.

“You see, a certain monster lives on this mountain. During this time of year, it multiplies like mad and starts popping up everywhere. It’s so dangerous that it wipes out all the other monsters. Normally, there are no monsters on this mountain at all.”

As she explains, the demon lord leads the way up the mountain.

Suddenly, I feel my skin prickle with goosebumps.

“Here it comes.”

The ground shakes.

Dirt bulges up all over the place, and monsters emerge from beneath it!

It’s…a green mushroom?

“It’s a fearsome mushroom monster that people call ‘the green devil.’ They reproduce during this part of autumn, then all pop out of the ground at once and attack anything that sets foot on the mountain.”

Even during the demon lord’s explanation, more and more mushrooms pop out of the ground.

Then they all start smoothly sliding toward us.

How are they even moving like that?

“What’s terrifying about green devils is that they’re persistent and lethal. Once they’ve set their sights on you as prey, they won’t stop chasing you until you’re dead. And all they have to do to attack is touch you. By the way, if one touches you, you’ll die.”

Huh? What does that mean?

“Technically speaking, if it touches you, it deals exactly one thousand damage, which is enough to kill most normal humans instantly. Also, no resistance skills can lessen the set amount of damage. It’s pretty scary.”

What the hell? That’s terrifying.

A monster that can cause a thousand points of damage with a single touch is the stuff of nightmares.

And a whole bunch of those nightmarish mushrooms are charging at us right now.

No wonder the demon lord called them dangerous.

“But we must face down such a fearsome foe nonetheless! Because, my dear White, these things are absolutely delicious!”

Well, you should’ve led with that!

Thus, the demon lord and I began our battle against the mass of mushrooms.

And now, a full-course mushroom feast is lined up before our eyes.

Mushroom soup, dressed raw mushrooms, mushroom salad, sautéed mushrooms…

And the main star of the meal is grilled mushrooms.

In my humble opinion, the most luxurious way to eat a mushroom is to grill it whole and drizzle it with soy sauce.

Tragically, there’s no soy sauce here.

In a lot of isekai stories, the first thing a Japanese person does in a new world is search for rice and soy sauce. I get that, I really do.

Soy sauce is the best condiment of all time, if you ask me.

But there’s no use crying over spilled soy sauce, or lack thereof.

Now then, let’s taste this full-course mushroom meal!

I take my first bite of a mushroom, which is still a vivid green that doesn’t seem appropriate for a mushroom at all.

But while it may be a poisonous-looking color, plenty of vegetables are bright green, too.

There’s no reason mushrooms can’t be green.

Even if they are poisonous, it’s not like any poison can hurt me at this point.

So I bite down on a little piece of mushroom.

It’s got that unique mushroom texture, soft with just the right amount of springiness.

And with that first bite, the flavor of the mushroom fills my mouth.

Some people might not like the taste of mushrooms, but I personally love it.

Yummm.

Despite its appearance, there’s nothing poisonous about this stuff.

Poison usually makes things taste bitter, and there’s not even a hint of bitterness in the deep flavor caressing my taste buds.

I feel like it sort of tastes like matsutake. Not that I’ve ever eaten matsutake.

“Whaddaya think? Tasty, right?”

The demon lord, who both procured and prepared the food, puffs her chest up proudly.

Hell yeah, it’s tasty. Maybe you should quit being a demon lord and become a professional chef instead?

Before long, we’ve scarfed down every last bite of the massive mushroom feast.

But there are still plenty more mushrooms where that came from.

Each mushroom is around the size of a person’s head, after all.

We harvested way more than we could possibly eat in one go.

From that day on, we ate all kinds of mushroom dishes for quite a while. Still, I never once got sick of it, and eventually, we finished them all.

I guess that’s what you get with great ingredients and a great chef.

STREET FOOD

Street food is a magical concept made of hopes and dreams!

Just as the name implies, it’s food you can buy and eat right on the street.

What a wonderful phrase.

Thus far, I’ve never even been able to set foot in a town.

Y’know, being a spider and all.

Even when I evolved into an Arachne, my lower half was still very clearly a spider.

If I walked into town looking like that, I guarantee there’d be nothing but chaos!

Which is why whenever the demon lord or Vampy or whoever went into town to buy supplies, I always had to stay behind and hide outside of town.

Here I am, reborn in a fantasy world, and I can’t even go sightseeing in town.

The best I could do was use Clairvoyance to get a good look around, doing some pathetic pseudo-sightseeing, which is better than nothing.

But still not enough! Because all I could do was look, remember!

Even if there was some delicious-looking food, I had no way of tasting it!

Huh? I got to eat the demon lord’s cooking, so what’s the problem?

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Oh, you sweet summer child. Don’t be so naive!

When you see festival food stalls, you’re suddenly dying to eat that food, right?

Even though you know it’s overpriced and would be cheaper to make yourself.

You know that and buy it anyway. That’s the street food effect.

This is basically the same idea.

It’s fantasy world food! Of course you want to buy it in town and walk around sightseeing while you eat it!

The atmosphere, the ambiance—that kinda thing is a spice unto itself, you know!

Do you have any idea how I felt, forced to watch longingly from afar as the demon lord and Vampy walked around snacking on street food and laughing it up without me?!

But now! I don’t have to suffer through such agony ever again!

Now that I’ve become a god and taken on a mostly humanoid form, I can walk right into town with my head held high!

In other words, I can buy and eat street food!

Whoo-hoooo!

And so, for the first time in my spider life, I’m treating myself to some sightseeing.

Accompanied by the demon lord.

“So where would you like to go first, White?”

“Street food.”

“Ah, yes.”

The demon lord looks kind of amused, maybe because it’s rare for me to answer so quickly.

“Hmm. Street food, though… I’m not sure if it’s going to be quite what you’re imagining. Let’s head to the market for now, shall we?”

At the demon lord’s suggestion, we head to the town’s market street.

But it’s reeeally crowded…

The actual number of people isn’t necessarily that high, but because they’re shoving their way into every square inch of this narrow road, it ends up being totally packed.

The town planning could’ve used some work here.

We walk through the market as best we can, getting pushed along by the flow of the crowd.

It’s definitely not the right scene for a leisurely stroll with some street food…

Yeah, no. This isn’t it.

This isn’t what I wanted at all!

Not to mention, the food for sale here isn’t really street food, either—it’s just ingredients!

I’m talking raw meat and uncooked veggies!

There’s nothing to buy and eat on the spot.

“See? I tried to warn you. In a small town like this, there aren’t really any stalls to buy street food.”

I can’t stand the look on the demon lord’s stupid face.

Of course. This is another world.

I was thinking by the standards of Japan, where there’s always some kind of shop or stall near a train station where you can buy and eat snacks, but that doesn’t apply here.

You can’t even get street food. Never underestimate a fantasy world.

Also, I’m starting to get tired of walking.

And it’s so crowded that I’m feeling a little queasy, too.

Never underestimate my wimpy body.

“See, most of these markets are just selling local food to local folks, so they’re usually just a lot of stalls selling raw ingredients. Of course, there are restaurants and such, but you can’t buy food and walk around with it. Plates aren’t free, you know?”

Ah, I guess that’s true.

I never thought about it in Japan, because there are mass-produced plastic containers and such. In this world, though, a lot of work probably goes into making even a single plate.

If they included a plate for walking around and eating, it’d be too expensive and no one would buy it, or else they’d be selling it at a loss.

So yeah, it makes sense that there’s no street food culture here…

“Well, it’s not like there’s nothing at all, though. Here.”

The demon lord buys something at a stall and offers it to me.

I hold out my hand, and she puts a small fruit in my palm.

“These are really good, trust me.”

As she speaks, the demon lord pops her own fruit into her mouth and munches on it.

I follow her lead and eat mine, too. Mmm, that’s sweet.

In the end, even if it wasn’t quite what I imagined, I still had a pretty good time on my fantasy world street food tour.

AEL

The elder sister figure of the puppet spiders, Ael, is very dependable.

Or to put it more accurately, the other three are all a hot mess.

Since she’s always keeping her screwball sisters in line, Ael ends up seeming smart and reliable by comparison.

Even now, she’s spending all her time looking after the other three.

It’s just about mealtime.

The meal the demon lord made for us is spread out before our eyes.

Of course, since we’re usually camping out and living off the land, our meals mostly consist of stuff we foraged in the wild.

Like whole-roasted monster meat or veggies stir-fried in a big pot.

It’s not like we have a proper kitchen or anything, either, so it tends to end up being a quantity over quality kind of situation.

I’m not complaining, mind you. Just having food that’s been cooked at all is such a blessing to me that I could literally cry.

So what are the puppet sisters doing in the face of the demon lord’s home-cooked, multi-course meal? Whatever the hell they want, that’s what.

First, you’ve got Sael.

She’s shilly-shallying up a storm.

Sael is super-indecisive and practically has no mind of her own, so she can’t decide what to eat and keeps going back and forth, hovering over different dishes.

What’s wrong with you?!

So Ael picks some food out at random, piles it on a plate, and hands it to Sael.

If someone doesn’t dole out food for her like this, Sael will seriously go a whole meal without eating.

Next up is Riel.

Riel keeps freezing in the middle of eating her food.

Each time, Ael pokes her gently, and she resumes eating. I have no idea what makes her freeze in the first place, though.

According to the demon lord, “Riel’s a little…no, extremely spacey, so she might honestly be stopping because she forgot what she was doing. Maybe.”

What’s wrong with you?!

It kinda makes it look like Ael is her caregiver.

Last but not least is Fiel.

Ael currently has her in a full nelson.

Why, you ask?

Because she eats too much.

Fiel acts without thinking and gets carried away easily. She’s so brainless that she doesn’t notice anything else around her.

She’s also driven purely by desire.

What this means is that if there’s food in front of her, she’ll attempt to eat as much as she wants without worrying about whether everyone else gets enough.

Oh, and like most spider monsters, she has the Overeating skill.

When you have that skill, you can eat a lot more than your body would normally hold.

If someone like that eats as much as they want, there won’t be a speck left for anyone else!

Therefore, Ael has to pin Fiel down before she eats too much at every meal.

By the way, if Ael doesn’t stop her, she’s getting a swift punch to the face from yours truly, no-holds-barred.

So Ael is really being very kind by comparison.

Ah, sisterly love.

She saves her rascally little sister’s life, even if it means that sister will be mad at her.

Brings a tear to my eye.

I’m still gonna punch her lights out if she eats too much food, though.

I won’t let anyone lay a hand on my food, no exceptions.

Fiel shudders in the midst of her full nelson, as if she can sense me seething at her in this hypothetical scenario.

When Ael lets go of her, she still sits there quietly.

Since she lives on instinct alone, she’s also good at picking up on this kind of thing.

So yeah, long story short, the puppet spider sisters are all problem children except for Ael.

Ael is pretty much forced to be the sensible one, which makes her the acting elder sister who looks after the other three by default.

And all three of them are a handful in different ways, too.

I’m sure you can tell how tough that is by how much she’s had to stay on top of them during the course of this one mealtime alone.

Ael’s very capable.

You can’t even spell “capable” without “Ael.”

But no matter how capable she is or how hard she’s working, I’m not slowing down for her sake or anyone else’s!

You know I don’t compromise when it comes to food!

Now that Fiel’s settled down, my rival is out of the game!

I’m going to gobble up every single scrap of food that’s left on the table!

Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

And since Ael’s so busy with her sisters, I’m only doing her a favor by eating in her stead!

…Hmm?

That’s odd.

There was still more meat left on that plate last time I checked.

That meat was the main dish of this meal, and there was enough that there should still be a few pieces left over even after everyone’s had one.

Where did the rest of it go?

With a gasp, I whip around to look at Ael.

She’s smiling even as she shifts her eyes away from mine.

Why, you little…! When did you even manage that?!

Yes, the eldest puppet spider sister Ael is dependable, all right.

And you can also depend on her to snatch up the best bits when no one’s looking, the shrewd little thing.

SAEL

Among the unique personalities of the puppet spider sisters, the one who somehow stands out the most by standing out the least is Sael.

Sael is super-timid and always lets other people tell her what to do.

Based on that description, yeah, you’d assume she wouldn’t stand out at all.

But you’d be dead wrong.

To put it bluntly, that personality trait of hers is so exaggerated that it actually stands out a lot.

Her sense of self-determination is so lacking that she literally won’t move unless someone gives her an order.

In other words, someone constantly has to be looking after her.

Her situation is so extreme that it’s always causing trouble for either the elder sister figure of the puppet spiders, Ael, or her original master, the demon lord.

She seriously can’t do aaanything on her own.

Really. She can’t, she won’t, and she doesn’t even want to try.

Apparently, it’s because she doesn’t know what to do.

Usually, the demon lord and the other puppet spider sisters are around, and she just follows their lead.

So in most circumstances, aside from seeming a little weird, she doesn’t cause any major problems.

And when there’s an emergency, she’s able to act based on the ultimate goal of defeating the enemy.

But if nothing’s going on and you tell her she’s free to do whatever she wants, she’ll totally shut down.

Like one time, we happened to reach this beautiful river.

It was a peaceful area in the mountains, and there didn’t seem to be any danger around, so we decided to kick back for a little while.

It’s exhausting to just walk day in and day out, after all.

You’ve gotta take breaks like this once in a while, or you won’t be able to go on.

So everyone started playing to their heart’s content.

Fiel was swimming against the river’s current, Riel let the current carry her away, and Ael was running after Riel to make sure she didn’t get swept too far out.

Vampy was collecting pretty stones from the riverbed, and Mera went along with her.

The demon lord and I used our thread to do some serious fishing.

It’ll be grilled fish for dinner tonight!

And what was Sael doing? As you might have guessed, absolutely nothing.

She kept wandering back and forth, unsure what to do.

Fidget in one spot, fret in another spot.

Watching her was just… Hmm, how do I put this? Yeah…annoying as hell.

Just play, dammit!

You’ve been notified that you’re allowed to play now, so just play already!

Why aren’t you playing, huh?!

What do you want to do?!

I gotta admit, I got kinda pissed off seeing her total lack of independence.

I mean, isn’t that ridiculous?

Just doing whatever people tell you to do, never thinking and acting for yourself?

I really don’t get it.

But if you put it another way, you could also say she’s super-obedient, so maybe some guys would be into that sorta thing.

She’s like the ultimate yes-man.

The demon lord and Ael seem to just see her as a bit of a troublesome kid, not to the point of hating her or anything.

Look, I don’t hate her, either, okay?

I don’t hate her; she just drives me nuts sometimes.

Like, c’mon, get it together.

She looks like a lost little girl at the riverside, moseying around with no idea what to do.

But you realize on the inside she’s actually an incredibly rare and dangerous monster, right?

Given her true nature, can you blame me for wanting her to have a little more dignity?

Although I guess you could say that about the other puppet spiders, too.

But still, Sael’s attitude is the worst.

The other three aren’t exactly dignified, but at least they’re not annoyingly wimpy.

I guess I know why it makes me mad, though. It kinda goes against my own personal code of honor.

There’s no point in living if you’re just surviving.

If you don’t have pride, I’d say you’re not truly living at all.

And in that respect, Sael really just survives by going with the flow all the time.

She does whatever the demon lord or her other sisters tell her, with no free will of her own.

When it comes down to it, can you really even call that living?

Is Sael really Sael, or is she just a puppet that happens to have a name?

It’s not right. It’s just not right!

That’s not living at all, if you ask me!

She’s got to really experience life on her own terms!

I know I just have to give her a moment when she’s keenly aware of living.

So she’ll be happy to be alive.

Maybe then she’ll learn to make her own choices.

Which is why, a few days after we stopped at the river to play, I casually put Sael through a near-death experience.

The result was that she sat there with a thousand-yard stare.

That’s weird. I was trying to give her the will to live, so why is she looking more lifeless and empty than ever?

I don’t get it.

FIEL

Each of the puppet spiders has a vastly different personality.

Even though they don’t talk or use Telepathy, you can still get a pretty clear sense of who they are through their everyday actions and overall behavior.

Of the four of them, I think Fiel’s personality is particularly easy to read.

To sum it up in a single word, Fiel is a brat.

The puppet spiders do look like little girls, so it’s not that weird for one to have a bratty personality.

But on the inside, they’re actually monsters with stats that average over ten thousand, so I assume that means they’ve lived relatively long lives.

And yet Fiel’s behavior is exactly as bratty as her appearance.

If anything, I’d say she acts like a rascally little boy.

First, she runs around a lot.

Even if nothing’s happening.

She just runs anyway.

While the rest of us are walking in silence, there she is, scampering around us in circles.

Yeah, that should give you an idea of how permanently high-energy Fiel tends to be.

That kid just has zero chill.

She’s constantly moving, like she literally can’t sit still.

And she also constantly wants attention.

She’ll pester anyone and everyone to get them to look at her.

Generally, this involves a lot of hugging.

But we’re talking about Fiel-quality hugs here.

She’s just throwing her arms around you, except with all the force of a flying tackle.

Now, the demon lord and I can handle the impact.

But the other puppet spiders, due to their similar builds and stats, get sent flying.

That’s still not a big deal since it doesn’t cause much damage.

The real problem is Vampy and Mera.

“Y-young miss…!!!”

When Vampy got hit with the body slam Fiel considers a hug, she got knocked into the air, her body making all kinds of cracking and crunching sounds that the human body was never meant to make.

She probably couldn’t even hear Mera’s urgent cry.

Maybe her life was flashing before her eyes?

Well, Vampy has the Undying Body skill, which means she can survive any lethal attack, albeit only once a day. So she wasn’t gonna die.

We had to heal her right away or things might’ve been dicey, though.

Between Mera’s desperate medical treatment and Vampy’s naturally high self-healing abilities, she made a full recovery after that.

In the meantime, the demon lord sat Fiel down and gave her a good talking-to.

I don’t know if making her sit in a kneeling position makes any difference when that’s just a puppet body, though…

But even if it wasn’t a physical punishment, apparently being forced to sit still and get lectured had enough of an emotional effect.

After that, Fiel didn’t try to hug Vampy again.

Mera?

Yeah, of course she tried to do it to him, too.

But Vampy stopped her in her tracks.

“You do know what will happen if you try that, right?”

She stared Fiel down up close and whispered right into her face.

Yeah, let’s just say that was pretty darn effective.

I swear I felt the temperature around us actually go down by a few degrees.

Vampy’s way too obsessed with Mera to let any other girl touch him, let alone hug him.

The crazy thing is that in terms of stats alone, there’s no way Vampy could beat Fiel. But she was still so intimidating that all Fiel could do was nod very fervently and back off.

I guess that’s the power of love.

The scary, serial-killer kind of love, that is.

…Good luck, Mera!

And so we somehow managed to get Fiel to stop hug-attacking the vampire duo, at the very least.

Except for some reason, that led her to start targeting me instead.

Now I get attacked at least once a day.

A full-body glomp, always out of nowhere.

Do you think I like having to catch her every time?

If I’m not properly braced, I’ll get bowled over, too, and my HP even goes down a little.

But nobody will come to my defense.

No one is trying to mend Fiel’s evil ways. They all act like it’s fine if I’m her target!

Sometimes, it even seems like they’re pushing her toward me on purpose!

Especially Ael!

She’s the elder sister figure of the puppet spiders, and sometimes she drops one or two of the others on me to lighten her own load.

Goddammit, man!

Why do I have to look after some stupid little kids?!

Plus, they’re technically older than me!

Despite how I look, I’m actually about the same age as Vampy.

In this world, I’m still well within the realm of childhood.

Meanwhile, even though Fiel looks like a little girl, she’s definitely gotta be older than me (even if I don’t know her exact age).

How does it make sense for a younger kid to get stuck looking after someone who’s older?

I just don’t get it.

RIEL

Out of all the puppet spiders, the sister that’s hardest for me to understand is Riel.

Seriously, I have no idea what her deal is.

She’s so incomprehensible that she’s practically a cryptid.

The demon lord says Riel is just a total airhead, but that doesn’t explain all of her weirdness by a long shot.

First of all, her expressions.

The puppet spiders can manipulate their puppet bodies to deliberately change expressions.

Their faces don’t change naturally to reflect their emotions like humans’ do.

So, usually, the puppet spiders only change their expressions when they want to convey the emotion they’re currently feeling to someone else.

Otherwise, they just have a set expression like a doll.

Not even like a doll—they are dolls, really.

And Riel’s set expression is usually a smile.

I mean, yeah, that makes sense.

Ael and Fiel are usually set in a smile, too.

But there’s something about Riel’s expression…a certain spooky vacantness that makes it impossible to tell what she’s thinking.

Maybe it’s just because she has the most composed-looking facial features of the other girls, but she’s got this sorta mysterious Mona Lisa smile going on.

And she almost never alters that expression at all.

Of course it’s hard to read someone whose expression never changes.

So I still can never tell what’s going on in Riel’s head.

With the other puppet spiders, I can usually get some idea of what they’re thinking based on their gestures and stuff, even if their expressions aren’t changing.

But Riel’s actions are even more confusing than her lack of expression.

Like, she’ll trip for no reason.

How can a powerful monster with stats over ten thousand apiece randomly fall over when there’s nothing to trip on?

It’s actually kind of incredible.

Other times, she just stops.

Out of nowhere, she’ll suddenly just freeze mid-motion, as if time has stopped for her or something.

Did you get hit with a time-stop attack or something?

And sometimes, she just stares at a random empty spot.

Usually, I’ll look to see if there’s something there that I just didn’t notice. Nope, nothing.

I can’t see anything, and I don’t detect any kind of presence, either.

So what in the world is she looking at?

Is this like that thing cats do?

So yeah. All in all, our girl Riel is a mysterious creature.

But there have been a few occasions where she does something so baffling that her normal behavior seems tame by comparison.

It happened one day when we were walking through a forest.

The strongest monster in the forest, a giant bear, showed up and attacked us.

This thing was so huge—probably about two stories tall—that you practically had to crane your neck back to look at it.

And it clearly had some guts, too, because it charged right at us even in the face of the demon lord’s intimidation.

Most normal monsters would be too afraid of the demon lord to attack us like that.

But it overcame its fear and stepped out in front of us. Pretty impressive, I’d say.

Although I wouldn’t call it the smartest move.

Anyway, Riel kicked this bear to the curb.

Literally—she slammed its jaw with a flawless kick.

A somersault kick! Amazing!

I don’t know if it was actually all that flawless or amazing, though.

Unless I’m sorely mistaken, I’m pretty sure she just tripped and fell, didn’t she?

She tried to step forward, tripped, and went flying so ridiculously that it just happened to look like a somersault, right?

How can someone trip and fall so fantastically that they kick a giant, two-story-tall bear square on the jaw in the process?

That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever seen.

Like, the distance from the ground to the bear’s jaw was easily the height of a small building. And she managed to trip and fall that high?

Seriously, make it make sense.

Plus, even though she definitely just tripped, it still resulted in some kind of kick from Riel, whose stats are over ten thousand.

No ordinary monster could withstand that kinda damage. Poor bear went straight to heaven.

Honestly, we were lucky that the bear’s head still stayed in one piece in the process.

If that had been a real kick, its head probably would’ve exploded.

But Riel just started smacking the dead bear’s head anyway. Maybe she was embarrassed that she tripped or something.

And all that time, she’s wearing the same creepy smile as always.

Talk about scary!

I was seriously freaked out, dude!

A little girl runs into a bear in the forest one day, and the bear gets killed?! Some fairy tale!

How am I supposed to react to a sight like that?!

So that’s why I think Riel is the scariest of the puppet spider sisters.

You never know what she’s thinking or what she’s gonna do next.

Honestly, she’s like something out of a horror movie.

Aside from the demon lord, she’s the last person I’d want to have as an enemy.

Hell, even as an ally, she’s so unpredictable that it’s bad enough for my heart as it is.

By the way, we made the bear into bear stew.

It was delicious. The end.

ONE DAY IN THE DEMON TERRITORY

The demon territory is at the northern end of the continent.

And the southern parts, which are closer to the human territory, are the most populated.

Why, you ask? Well, there are two very simple reasons for that.

A cold wind assails my body, making me shiver.

No matter how much I blow on my freezing hands, it isn’t enough to bring warmth back into my numb fingertips.

Yeah. First of all, it’s stupid cold.

Not as bad as the Mystic Mountains, but the further north you go, the lower the average temperature gets, making the land less and less habitable.

I rub my hands together. I should’ve brought gloves or something…

Vampy and the others aren’t wearing gloves, so I didn’t even think of it.

But they’re barehanded because Vampy says gloves make it hard to hold a sword…

Even now, she’s swinging her big broadsword at a monster charging toward us.

The heavy-looking blade whips effortlessly through the air, slicing the monster neatly in two.

Vampy can take down even a ten-foot-tall monster with a single swing of her sword.

This particular monster, called a deloombeik, has a face like a cross between a wolf and a bear and can walk on two legs or four legs like some kind of hairy part-man, part-beast creature.

It’s apparently one of the stronger monsters in the demon territory, dangerous enough that just one of them showing up can cause a serious commotion.

But that’s all by ordinary standards. For us, it doesn’t even register as a threat.

…For us.

I can hear monsters howling all over the place.

Looking around, I see a pack of deloombeiks, more than I can count on two hands.

…Yeah. There’s no way people could live in an area where these things are prowling all over the place.

So between the cold and the threat of monsters, the northern part of the demon territory isn’t really safe to inhabit.

Technically speaking, we’re still in the southern half of the territory. However, this pack of deloombeiks looked like it might keep moving south, so we came here to get rid of them.

The exterminator team consists of me, Vampy, Mera, and Mr. Oni.

The demon lord and the puppet spiders came along because they had nothing else to do, except they’re just ignoring the monsters and skating around on a frozen pond or something, those jerks.

Do some work for once, demon lord.

Honestly, we can handle monsters like this just fine without their help, but still… Come on!

In fact, I think Vampy, Mera, and Mr. Oni might be more than enough on their own.

Vampy stands at the ready, and every time a deloombeik comes close, she slices it clean in half.

She’s even kinda making it look like boring manual labor.

I think she’d have a harder time losing against these things.

While Vampy is mostly immobile, Mera is moving all over the place.

He keeps changing his position so he won’t get surrounded, fighting them one at a time whenever he can.

And even when it is one-on-one, he still carefully keeps an eye on his opponent and strikes at exactly the right moment.

Ahhh, good ol’ Mera.

He’s so consistent; it’s reassuring to watch him.

As for Mr. Oni, he seems to be having a bit of a harder time.

He keeps nearly getting hit by an attack or getting surrounded, that kind of thing.

Hmm? Wait a minute…

Despite all that, he still looks sort of unruffled.

Maybe he’s not struggling at all, he’s just testing out different moves and strategies while he fights?

He keeps stealing glances at Vampy and Mera in the process, too.

He’s watching Mera especially closely.

Wow, is he trying to incorporate Mera’s moves into his own fighting style?

Huh, I get it. He’s fighting and training at the same time.

I guess he’s always striving to improve himself.

At any rate, it looks like these three can wipe out all the monsters easily, so I guess throwing the demon lord party into the mix would just be overkill.

What? Me?

I dunno, my job is basically just to sit and watch, okay?

Besides, I’m the one who teleports us here and back, got it?

And I’m also the one who spotted this deloombeik pack in the first place, got it?

You got it? Good.

Yeah. I’m totally working. I’m working sooo hard.

I dare you to say otherwise.

I’m certainly working harder than those loafers who are skating around having the time of their lives, that’s for damn sure.

Glancing over, I see the demon lord and the puppet spiders gracefully gliding across the ice.

The demon lord’s skating is especially elegant.

With her incredibly high physical abilities and all, she looks as skillful as a pro figure skater.

Oh wow, she did a jump.

I’d call that…a quadruple axel.

If this were Earth, I bet she’d be Olympics-bound.

After seeing the demon lord do it, Fiel tries to do a jump, too.

But she has so much momentum that she’s spinning way too much.

Looks like… How many axels was that?

She’s kinda moving too fast for me to count.

Then, when she lands, it’s with so much force that the ice cracks under her feet.

Yep. Not even a hint of elegance there.

Conclusion: There is such a thing as too many spins in figure skating.

Whoa, now the demon lord’s doing an Ina Bauer.

The one where they lean their upper body back and zoom around.

The official name for this move is a “layback Ina Bauer.” There’s your fun fact for the day.

Hmm? Now Riel is copying the demon lord and doing… Um, can you really call that an Ina Bauer?

She’s bent so far back that her head is nearly skimming the ice, and she’s just letting her arms hang loose, so she’s skating forward instead of sideways?

Huh? How is she even moving forward in that position?

Is that possible?

Instead of an Ina Bauer, she’s basically doing a bridge while sliding forward in a way that looks really disturbing?

It’s such a creepy pose, I’d believe it if you told me she was possessed by a demon.

…I’ll just pretend I didn’t see that.

Ael is off to one side by herself, basically doing curling.

She’ll slide a stone across the ice and try to get it to stop in a circle she drew on there.

She’s even taking turns and everything; when she manages to get a stone in the circle, she launches the next one to try and knock it out.

A single-player curling match…

It’s the kind of thing that’s a little depressing to watch, like solo rock-paper-scissors, where you just know that poor kid probably doesn’t have any friends.

But since Ael normally has her hands full taking care of the other three all the time, she actually looks kind of energized playing by herself.

I feel like I just saw a new side of Ael.

As for the last sister, Sael…

She’s just standing on the ice and trembling.

Exactly like a little kid who’s just arrived at a skating rink for the very first time.

Aw, how relaxing.

I never thought I’d see the day when I’d describe looking at Sael as “relaxing.”

I think since the other three are being so ridiculous that a normal reaction feels very soothing.

Like, yes, good. That’s how it’s supposed to be.

A part of me is wondering, “You really can’t do it when you have such high stats?” But it’s cute to see her have a normal childlike reaction, too.

Although, of course, a fierce battle against a pack of monsters is still taking place right next to that soothing scene.

Now, that’s not relaxing at all!

And in a way, seeing these guys happily skating around while a bloodbath takes place in their immediate vicinity is kind of scary, too.

…Well, I do have enough ice skates for everyone, so I guess we can all do some skating once the monster cleanup is done.

Okina Baba Q&A Interview Part 3

We’ve now finished introducing everyone who could be considered a main character.

Next, we’ll have a gallery of Kiryu-sensei’s illustrations and a section about one of the biggest highlights of the series, the Great Human-Demon War. But first!

About the differences between the web and print versions

Editor: The serialized web novel (WN) version and the print light novel (LN) version go in drastically different directions partway through the story. What made you decide to make those changes?

Baba: Really, I would say that I had no choice but to make those changes. The contents of the LN versus the WN get very different starting with Volume 4 because the story of Volume 4 didn’t have any kind of ending. When it was time to deal with all of the Sophia and Sariella stuff, it was too hard to fit it all into one volume, so I ended up turning it into two parts: Volume 4 and Volume 5. But if I kept it the same as the WN, then Volume 4 would just be a whole book of Kumoko wandering around in the outside world. Which is why I added things like the fight with Mother and her ongoing clash with the demon lord. I needed to introduce more conflict and a climax to make a proper ending for Volume 4, and so it wound up being very different from the WN. Also, since I was focused on easy readability in the WN, I didn’t get to fully explain the state of the world. I wanted to spend more time really exploring things like the relationship between Ohts and Sariella, the motives and machinations of the Word of God and Potimas, and so on, which resulted in a lot of new material.

Editor: Right, because online serialization and published books are very different beasts. In other words, were those necessary changes in order to make each volume more satisfying to read as a single book?

Baba: For that same reason, I ended up writing a lot of new material for Volume 6, too. I wanted to give characters who had appeared up till Volume 5, namely Ariel, Sophia, and Merazophis, a chance to properly sort out their feelings and let them settle down for a beat. If I didn’t take time to make it clear what each character is thinking and feeling as they proceed, the rest of the journey would end up seeming murky. So with all that in mind, I was thinking about each volume’s themes, climax, and highlights…and next thing you know, I couldn’t make my way back to the flow of the WN’s story anymore, LOL.

Editor: The Puppet Taratects weren’t such major characters in the WN, either, right?

Baba: Among other things, I thought they would provide some relief while the other characters are all going through their own internal struggles. And even though they can’t even talk, they managed to establish such distinct personalities for themselves… They’re definitely in the category of characters who developed a mind of their own.

About the character designs

Editor: Out of all the character designs by Tsukasa Kiryu-sensei, who provides the illustrations for the series, which one did you most love right off the bat?

Baba: I think the one that really hit me like a bolt of lightning was Merazophis. When I saw a draft of Mera’s character design while we were working on Volume 5, I just immediately said, “YES! That’s Merazophis!!!” Up until then, Mera was still a little bit of a nobody in my mind, or at least I only had a vague, fuzzy impression of him. But when I saw Kiryu-sensei’s design, it all snapped into focus. From that moment on, Mera’s background and emotions became clear as day to me. Thanks to that, I was able to dig deeper into his character in Volume 6.

Editor: You generally leave the design decisions up to Kiryu-sensei, right? Does that mean that you avoid describing characters’ appearances too specifically, even though you put a lot of detail into character creation otherwise?

Baba: When it comes to appearances, I do make a deliberate point of not setting too much in stone. Since the WN doesn’t have illustrations in the first place, it was my intention to let the readers imagine the characters however they like. So I decided not to make their descriptions too detailed, aside from any features that were necessary for story reasons. When I first got Shun’s character design, I was surprised to see that he had rather narrow eyes because I’d pictured him looking on the daintier side. So it was interesting to see how his character came across through Kiryu-sensei’s eyes.

This has been the Q&A interview with Okina Baba. Did you enjoy learning more about the background and creation of So I’m a Spider, So What? as much as we did? We hope this interview gets you even more interested in the series than before.

YOUNG MASTER’S CHEER SQUAD

Hello! I’m a maid at Duke Phthalo’s manor!

And guess what? The young master has fallen in love!

What a shock!

The young master, also known as the Duke’s younger brother Sir Bloe, is frankly a dope who doesn’t understand a woman’s heart!

There were never any women in his life to begin with, and since he’s such a dope, no woman would ever come near him anyway!

His rank alone would make him quite a catch, and yet his dopiness is so devastating that women still want nothing to do with him!

Now, that’s never been a problem before!

Because he’s a dope who has no interest in women anyway!

But then the young master fell in love!

If nothing is done, then he’ll surely reveal his dopiness immediately and earn the lady’s disdain!

“And so, in order to save him from himself, we, the servants of the house, must support the young master!”

“Listen, you. Should you really be speaking so disparagingly about our employer’s brother?”

The head butler is saying something, but I’m just going to ignore him!

Deep down, I’m sure the head butler is constantly insulting the young master, too!

“But that stubborn fool has fallen in love, despite his very nature! We simply must cheer him on and support him!”

“And what’s your real motivation?”

“I want him to get married and move out of the manor immediately!”

“Are you trying to get yourself fired?”

Despite the head butler’s heavy sigh, the other maids are all nodding and agreeing with me!

“Oh dear. I wonder why women despise our dear boy so much…”

“Because he’s rude and insensitive!”

That’s an easy one!

I know he’s a good person at heart!

But he’s always acting so rude and insensitive, so if you asked me whether I like or dislike him, I’d have no choice but to say the latter!

The head butler stares off into the distance with another deep sigh. All I did was tell the truth!

“Now, back to the matter at hand! What must our young master do to win Lady White’s heart? Everyone, please offer your opinions!”

And yet everyone remains completely silent!

Yes, I suspected this might happen!

The trouble is that on top of our young master’s dopiness, the object of his affections—one Lady White—is a complete mystery!

Lady White is currently staying at our manor as a guest, and it is her for whom the young master has fallen. However, none of us understands her in the slightest!

Most of us suspect she might be neither human nor demon!

That is how mysterious she is!

Given that her expression hardly ever changes, it’s impossible to guess what gifts or actions might make her happy!

“I don’t know… I was there when the young master fell in love, and I suspect it might be impossible for him to win over anyone from that first meeting, even if it were not someone as mysterious as Lady White. Is this not a doomed endeavor?”

This timid observation comes from a maid who was an eyewitness to the dramatic first meeting between the young master and Lady White!

I am told that he barged into the place yelling and somehow set fire to her room—a truly bizarre turn of events!

It’s true! This is no mere matter of winning her love. He is starting from a position of outright dislike!

And, at a glance, it would seem there is no recovering from such a disastrous start!

“Then the first step is to get him back from active dislike to a neutral position!”

“Dear me. I suppose the thing to do would be to have him give her presents and attempt to gradually earn back the trust that he has lost?”

Yes! We’ll put the head butler’s plan into action!

From then on, the young master began a present-based assault on Lady White’s heart with our words of advice, but thus far, the results are rather lacking! Mainly because he’s terrible at choosing presents!

But we shan’t give up! We’ll keep supporting the young master for as long as it takes!

IF THEY HAVE NO BREAD, THEN LET THEM EAT COOKIES

Since we arrived at the duke’s manor, I’ve been lounging in the lap of luxury.

The same is true for the food.

The dishes are all of very high quality. It’s a duke’s manor, after all.

The culture and technology in this world aren’t very advanced, but the cuisine isn’t too bad.

Especially when it’s cuisine being served in a fancy high-ranking noble’s house.

They use their wealth to collect the finest ingredients, then a personal chef carefully prepares and cooks them for you!

What a luxury!

…Yeah, seriously, this is really a ridiculous level of luxury.

’Cause I mean, the demon territory is kind of in the midst of a famine right now.

Demons live a whole lot longer than humans, but the tradeoff is that their reproduction rate is low.

As a result, there are waaay fewer demons than humans in terms of overall population.

Which also means there aren’t a lot of laborers to go around.

Even with stats that are higher than humans’, it’s not enough to cover for the sheer difference in population.

There’s strength in numbers, you know!

And on top of that, the demons only have one nation, and they have to provide 100 percent of their food for themselves.

In a world with monsters and stuff, not to mention less advanced technology, farming is a whole lot harder than it would be on Earth.

So, of course, they’re struggling to get by.

And yet here I am, getting three lavish meals a day with plenty of snacks to boot.

What a luxury!

In another time, if there was a peasant uprising, I’d be near the top of the list of victims!

If there’s a revolution, I’m going straight to the guillotine!

Not that I’m going to let that stop me from eating as much as I want, of course.

Besides, since I became a god, my stomach can’t hold an endless amount of food like it used to.

Curses! Curse this tiny stomach of mine!

So even though I’m living in luxury, it’s still a perfectly reasonable amount.

Which means there’s no reason to have any uprising or revolution. So stay away, okay?

Well, as much as the quantity I can eat has been reduced to the range of normality, the quality has gotten a lot more impressive.

Like I said, the standard of food in this world is pretty decent.

Even if there was a reincarnation who was a good cook, they probably couldn’t blow people’s minds with their food like in some light novels.

Especially since the ingredients here are totally different from Earth.

For instance, there might be a fruit that looks like an apple, but it’s still not an apple, and all the vegetation and growing methods are totally different.

I guess that should be obvious since it’s a different world and all.

And this also means that the cooking in this world has developed to suit the native ingredients.

So no reincarnation with some superficial cooking skills will be able to outclass a chef from this world who knows what to cook and how.

Although, there aren’t a lot of seasonings or condiments since the cuisine is mostly meant to emphasize the natural flavors of the ingredients, so I guess you might stand a chance if you find a tasty way to combine several seasonings.

Anyway, that’s what I’ve been thinking about as I snack on something that resembles a cookie.

Sure, it looks and tastes just like a cookie, but it’s still just an imitation.

First of all, the ingredients are totally different.

Believe it or not, this cookie is made by mixing a certain fruit with a potato-like vegetable and baking the concoction.

I guess the fruit probably serves as the sugar and the potato thing is sort of like wheat.

But either way, I definitely can’t imagine a Japanese person even thinking to mix fruit and potatoes.

So yeah. You can’t use your cooking knowledge to cheat your way to a good life here!

Besides, back on Earth, there were all kinds of different local and cultural cuisines with a huge variety of flavors. Even if you could somehow bring Japanese cuisine into this world, there’s no telling if anyone here would like it. Well, I’d be psyched, of course.

This fruit and the potato are relatively common ingredients in the demon territory, and you can get them at fairly cheap prices even though they’re sweet.

I’m told that some commoners even eat these cookies in place of meals if they’re low on food.

If they have no bread, then let the demons eat cookies, I guess…

Just another way that even the most common knowledge can change in a different world.

I feel like I learned another valuable lesson today.

THE GREAT HUMAN-DEMON WAR: DARAD

“Go, go, go!”

“Don’t let them get you!”

Bellowing voices echo across the battlefield.

In a few instances, my own voice is among them.

Under my command, the fifth battalion of the demon army is attacking a human fort.

This is now the third day of the battle.

Capturing a fort is a long and arduous process.

It could take ten days, twenty days, maybe even more.

And in the case of capturing a human fort that has fended off demon invasions for decades, it could very well take months or even years.

But though it may be hard to believe, all of the other battalions’ battles, save for ours, have already been decided.

The second, third, and eighth battalions won.

The fourth and sixth were defeated.

And the combined first and seventh, though they lost two generals in the process, succeeded in taking down the hero.

What miracles must have transpired to accomplish such a thing?

I cannot even begin to imagine.

While I do not think of myself as average, neither do I imagine myself to be among the most skilled of the demon generals.

The greatest general in my mind is Sir Agner, and he truly gave it his all.

Yet even Sir Agner could only defeat the hero’s party at the cost of his own life.

The world is truly full of wonders.

I must focus all of my efforts as well.

Unfortunately, the fight is not currently in our favor.

The enemy has both the locational and numerical advantage.

We must keep our losses to a minimum lest we be crushed by the difference in numbers.

This requires careful direction.

But if the battle drags on for too long, we will run out of supplies and be at an even further disadvantage.

We are already pouring everything we have into this battle, yet the humans still have resources to spare.

A lengthy battle would put us in an unfavorable position.

Yet we do not have the forces to overpower them in one fell swoop.

Thus, we are left with only one chance at victory.

Now, in this moment, when the news of the hero’s death has crushed the humans’ morale!

“The hero is dead! Humanity has lost! Now is the time to go on the attack! Chaaaarge!”

We shout at the top of our lungs, stirring our troops’ spirits and intimidating the enemy.

We continue spreading the news of the hero’s death.

At first, few would believe such words from the mouths of their enemy, yet over time, more would see reason.

And once they get confirmation that this is the truth, their morale will be crushed at once.

Such is the importance of the hero to the human race.

Just as the demon lord is so important to ours.

“Air corps, go!”

On my command, the flying unit takes off into the air, riding astride birdlike monsters.

They fly over the fort’s outer walls and rain down attacks on the enemies’ heads from above.

Amid the ensuing chaos, the cavalry hoists up ladders and charges at the enemy lines.

The enemy soldiers dump liquid over the sides of the wall to stop them.

Doused in the liquid, a few of our men fall screaming from their ladders.

It must be acid or something of the sort.

Damn the bastards!

Another enemy soldier leans over the wall with a bucket.

As if we would fall for the same trick twice!

I myself jump into the air and fly over the wall.

On the way, I kick down the soldier holding the bucket.

The soldier falls back, spilling the fatal liquid over himself instead.

I have heard that the Third Commander Sir Kogou brought down a fort with his excessive physical strength, but I do not have such power.

However, I do boast the ability to surpass a wall like this in a single leap.

“My name is Darad! I am the Fifth Demon Army Commander!”

I loudly declare myself and draw my magic sword.

This sword was given to me by the great demon lord herself.

It is a beautiful one-handed magic sword, evidently called a katana, and it fits in my hand as perfectly as if I had been wielding it for years.

“Have at thee!”

I cut down the enemy soldiers with my magic sword.

It slices through human bodies as easily as paper.

What an incredible edge!

To think that I was deemed worthy of such a splendid sword!

I cannot but be grateful to the demon lord!

The enemy, too, cowers before my sword’s power!

I can do this!

“There will be naught left of you but rust on my blade!”

I charge straight into the enemy lines.

The sun is setting now.

As the light grew dim, I issued the order to retreat.

“…It seems they’ve held us off.”

In the end, while we were able to proceed with the advantage throughout the day’s fight, we did not manage to bring down the fort.

“What are our losses?”

“We are still assessing, but I would estimate around forty percent…”

“…Quite heavy, then.”

The losses are even worse than I expected.

Even with the enemy’s morale shaken, it appears we still could not overcome the fundamental difference in our strength.

I sit down behind my military curtain in the camp enclosure.

Suddenly, great exhaustion bears down on me.

The armor I wear feels so heavy.

Though I try to take it off, my gloves and armor alike are so caked in the enemy’s blood that I can scarcely move any of it.

A subordinate comes to my assistance, and I finally succeed in getting out of my armor.

“Hrmmm…”

I groan aloud without meaning to.

Though my exhaustion from fighting on the front lines all day today is to be expected, the soldiers, too, have been fighting for three long days and nights.

While they have been sleeping in shifts, it is hardly a sound sleep when one must be on the alert for enemy assaults under the cover of darkness.

The enemy’s losses today were great enough that a night attack is doubtful, yet it is not impossible, and thus, none of us can sleep securely.

The soldiers’ exhaustion is only getting worse.

And the losses were so great.

We were unable to break through their defenses today.

So will we be able to manage tomorrow?

…Doubtful.

“What of the air corps?”

“I’m afraid most of them were shot down.”

“I see…”

The air corps can attack the enemy without being hindered by their walls.

Since the enemy is all too aware of that danger, they prioritize taking down any airborne attackers.

When holding down a fort, anti-air defenses are a deciding factor in the fort’s total defensive capabilities.

As this fort is on the front line of humanity’s defenses, of course it would not be lacking in that respect.

The loss of our air corps is a major blow.

“And the excavation team’s progress?”

“Unfavorable.”

The excavation team consists mainly of those who can use Earth Magic.

By digging holes under the enemy encampments, I had hoped they might create underground entrances to the fort or cause structural damage to destroy the walls.

However, since their success would put us at a great advantage, the enemy is equally on guard against such tactics.

While using magic makes the excavation much faster, it can more easily alert the enemy.

In many cases, the would-be invaders are buried alive by opposing Earth Magic users.

For this assault, we employed multiple teams: one to use Earth Magic to its full effect and prioritize speed, the other to dig by hand without using magic to avoid drawing attention.

The team openly using Earth Magic was a distraction.

We assumed the enemy would notice them; the goal was to keep the enemy occupied with fending them off.

Then, once they defeated the decoy team, the excavation team digging by hand would sneak in while their guards were down.

At least, that was the hope. Alas, it seems this too is not going to plan.

This battle is unlike any we’ve ever fought.

I was given a larger scale of forces than I have ever wielded before, with many strategic options.

Yet even after using all of these options, it seems we still cannot overcome the humans.

There is simply nothing we can do to surmount the difference in our numbers.

Even if we have ten different strategies, they can prepare twelve or thirteen squads to thwart them all.

A few of those may be bluffs, but it is still more than enough to crush all our plans.

And attempting to use a small number of people for a half-baked plan just results in them being wiped out.

In terms of individual strength, our forces outclass theirs one-to-one.

But when you break up these forces, they each become nothing but individual targets.

…In the end, I suppose our only choice really is to attack them head-on.

That is the best way to fully unleash the natural strength of individual demons, which one could say is likely our only advantage.

But try as I might to contemplate our odds of winning by attacking the fort head-on…I cannot conceive of the slightest chance of victory.

That is why I tried to come up with so many other solutions. Unfortunately, unless we all charge head-on, each of my individual plans has come to ruin, resulting only in the loss of more forces.

Groaning heavily, I fold my arms.

I am not clever enough to come up with a brilliant plan that might turn things around, not on my own.

“Hmmmgh…”

With a long sigh, I produce a small slab from my breast pocket.

It is a magic tool called a “smartphone.”

I press the button uncertainly.

BRRRRING! The sound startles me so much that I nearly drop it.

What next? I believe I am supposed to put it to my ear?

“Darad, is it?”

“Hrmm?! Oh-ho! Indeed!”

When Sir Balto’s voice suddenly speaks in my ear, it evokes such surprise and gratitude that I react much more loudly than necessary.

The demon lord’s mind is truly beyond my comprehension if she can craft such a tool.

“…We’re aware of the situation there already.”

His voice sounds low.

…He must be grieving Bloe’s death.

Bloe was Sir Balto’s brother.

While I always found the man disagreeable, I do still mourn the death of a comrade.

“About Bloe… My condolences.”

“No, it’s fine. Many lives have been lost in this battle. Bloe was simply one of those losses. That is all there is to it.”

Despite what he says, he cannot rationalize it to himself.

I can hear that much in his voice.

“At any rate, I assume you’ve contacted me to discuss your next course of action?”

“Indeed.”

Sir Balto stated that he is already aware of our situation, though I know not through what means.

As such, he must understand my predicament.

“Are we to retreat or attack? I seek the demon lord’s orders.”

Retreat or attack?

The order in which I state the options betrays my true feelings.

If I am to speak honestly, we have already lost this battle.

Now is the time to retreat.

The moment we failed to bring the fort down in today’s attack proved that we have no hope of doing so on any day hence.

Our forces have drastically declined.

Though theirs have also taken heavy losses, it is not enough that we could overpower them through momentum alone.

And time is also on their side.

If the battle drags on long enough, they might well be sent reinforcements, while we will have no such thing.

And in terms of food, weapons, and other supplies, humans have the overwhelming advantage over demons.

If we continue to fight, our defeat is a certainty.

With full knowledge of this fact, what orders will the great demon lord give us?

If she tells us to attack anyway, then there is nothing else for it.

I shall simply go on attacking until my last breath.

“I’ll put the demon lord on now.”

With that, the smartphone falls silent.

“Heyooo?”

A little while later, the great demon lord’s voice rings out instead.

“Great Demon Lord, ’tis truly an honor to hear thy voice.”

“Hoo, boy. C’mon, can’t we skip all that stuff? We’re never gonna get anywhere if you spend the whole conversation standing on ceremony like that.”

“But of course! At thy orders, Great Demon Lord, I shall do my utmost to relay my report in the most succinct manner I can possibly muster!”

“Ah, yeah, I dunno why I bother trying. It’s fine then. Lemme just say my piece.”

Sh-she’s fed up with me already…!

What a terrible blunder!

“I mean, there’s not actually that much to say anyway. Basically, you guys can totally retreat now.”

As I wallow in regret over irritating the great demon lord, she hands down the order to retreat.

That is what I had hoped for, of course, but the word was given so casually that for a moment I know not how to react.

“The hero’s dead, and we hit the numbers I was going for. I don’t think any more fighting will make that big of a difference at this point. And if we drag our feet too long, it’s gonna slow down our next move.”

Next…move?

Does that mean that the demon lord already has her sights on whatever comes after this enormous battle?

The great war to determine the fate of demons and humans…?

“Our next move? And what is that…?”

I blurt out the question despite myself.

For a vassal such as myself to pose a question to his lord without permission! Such insubordination!

“Hmm, I can’t say too much about it yet. You never know who might be listening.”

But the demon lord simply gives me a direct response without reproaching me for my insolence.

“I thank thee for the answer. And I must offer my sincerest apologies for posing a question so rudely.”

“Nah, it’s totally fine.”

Such generosity!

Truly, the demon lord is great!

“So anyway, at this point I’d say the sooner you guys retreat, the better, really. Can you do that?”

“Yes, of course.”

If that is the demon lord’s desire, then I am more than happy to begin preparations for our retreat at once.

I give my subordinate the hand signal for “retreat.”

We have developed a few methods of relaying orders without speaking in case of emergency, though I never thought I would use it in this way.

Truly, one never knows what might turn out to be useful.

“Oh yeah. Like I said, I can’t get into the details, but…”

The demon lord pauses a moment.

“This battle was only the beginning. That’s all I’ll say for now.”

Those words send a chill down my spine.

The beginning…?

A battle of this scale, an outright war, was only the beginning?

“The fighting’s going to go on for a while yet. So steel yourself, ’kay?”

With that, the smartphone ceases to make any sounds.

No more voices are forthcoming.

But I remain frozen in the same position.

I was born in the era of the previous demon lord.

Unlike the era that preceded it, in this one, there was no fighting with the humans, as the demon lord had disappeared without a trace.

I was born into a family that had sworn absolute fealty to the demon lord and was told that we must be the demon lord’s greatest sword, and yet I grew up with no demon lord to serve.

Thus, I also grew up without experiencing war.

Truth be told, this has been my first major battle.

I was honored to join the fight as a general and trembled with eagerness to earn honor and glory.

And so it pains me greatly that it ended in defeat. Ah, but wait!

This was only the beginning!

“I still have another chance to restore my honor!”

But at the same time, I feel a sense of dread.

If I failed at this battle, am I truly capable of keeping up with whatever is to come?

Can I be of use to the demon lord as her sword?

“Truly, I must steel myself.”

It is just as the demon lord told me.

I tuck the smartphone away and look up at the sky.

In the darkness that fell after sunset, the stars are twinkling.

They are pinpricks of light that could be swallowed up by the dark of night at any moment.

“Prepare to retreat!”

Pulling my eyes away from the feeble light of the stars, I raise my voice.

Feeble as their glow may be, the stars never go out.

I wish to follow their example.

Yes, why shouldn’t I shine as well?

Even in the darkness of these troubled times!

IN MEMORY OF YAMADA

“Yamada… He was a good guy.”

“We’ll never forget you, Yamada.”

“Yamada…rest in peace.”

“Yamada, let’s meet again in the next life.”

“Dude, we’re already in our next lives right now.”

The five reincarnation boys in the elf village are gathered in their quarters, deep in discussion.

The topic of their conversation: memorializing Yamada.

Incidentally, Yamada isn’t dead.

Well, he did die once, but that much is true of everyone present.

They all died in Japan and were reborn in this world.

In that sense, perhaps it would make sense to mourn. However, they weren’t memorializing him in that sense.

“I still can’t believe it. How is Shun, of all people, the first of us to land a girl?”

Ogiwara voices aloud what all the boys are thinking.

“Yeah, not to mention that his girlfriend is somehow Kanata?”

“She’s gonna have him whipped, that’s for sure.”

Earlier that day, they were reunited with Shunsuke Yamada. And he had a girlfriend.

What’s more, the girlfriend in question was Kanata Ooshima, who was male in their previous lives.

For some unfathomable reason, Kanata was reborn in this world as a woman and apparently fell in love with Yamada.

While neither of them had explicitly stated that they were dating, it was clear to everyone that they were more than just friends.

Ooshima, especially, was quick to fend off the other girls with an air of “hands off, he’s mine!”

Having known Kanata as a guy before, the boys didn’t know how to feel.

“Kanata got really pretty, huh?”

“Yeah, for sure.”

She was such a gorgeous girl that there was practically no trace of the old Ooshima.

“But I don’t think I’d wanna date her…”

“Yeah, for sure.”

Gorgeous or not, Ooshima was the aggressively pushy type.

Just as someone alluded to before, whoever dated her would have to be prepared to be kept on a short leash.

“Girls are way too scary.”

“Yeah, for sure.”

Everyone nods emphatically at that.

The reason being that while living in the elf village, the boys had to do as the girls decreed.

There were five boys in the elf village.

Meanwhile, there were eight girls.

Given that Tagawa and Kushitani had only arrived at the elf village recently, that meant there were four boys and seven girls for most of their lives here.

There were nearly twice as many girls as boys.

Since of course they went by majority rules, this created a pattern where women had more power than men.

Another big factor was that their former class president, Sachi Kudo, was among the girls.

While her ability to take charge was often a boon, it also meant that the girls inevitably had a stronger say in most matters.

And so the boys developed a bit of an inferiority complex.

It wasn’t as if they were oppressed or anything, but sometimes the girls looked at them like apex predators locking onto their prey.

And each time it happened, their inner instinct of “girls are scary!” grew a little stronger.

“Good luck, Yamada. I’m sure you’ll have some good moments in life, even if your future wife is scary.”

The boys all nod again.

In this world, their age equals the number of years they’ve been single, the lonely bastards.

The only one of them with a girlfriend is Tagawa, who just came to the elf village recently.

Tagawa wisely decided to keep that to himself.

As careless as he knew himself to be at times, even he wasn’t oblivious enough to open his mouth and put a target on his back in this situation.

“When I get out of here, I’m gonna get myself a cute girlfriend.”

“Careful, dude, that sounds like something you’d say right before you get killed. And don’t have any illusions about women, either. They’re all carnivores, remember. You wanna get eaten alive?”

“Besides, d’you really think we’re ever gonna get out of this place? I’m kinda worried we might just end up spending our whole lives in this forest…”

“Ha-ha, don’t be silly. That could…definitely happen, actually, yeah.”

As the other four wallowed in self-pity, all Tagawa could do was hold back tears.

They didn’t know if they’d ever get to leave the elf village.

And even if they did, they might never be able to have a proper love life.

The other boys were so pathetic in so many ways that Tagawa couldn’t help crying in pity.

“Hey, you, what’s with the ‘I’m not like these poor losers’ vibe?”

“Oh shit. That’s right. This asshole has a girlfriend, too. We should be memorializing him first, not Yamada.”

“Ah, Tagawa. He was a good guy.”

“We’re the ones to blame.”

And so the four lonely bastards formed an anti-couple committee and attacked Tagawa mercilessly.

FUJOSHI MEETING

“Okay, everyone, let’s begin.”

The girls are gathered around Sachi Kudo, who prepares to bring up the main topic of discussion.

In her old life, she was the student council president, giving her the air of a leader.

However…

“In short, our main topic today is as follows: Should we be shipping Yamada and Ooshima or not?”

The topic is a far cry from any serious or productive matter.

No, in a way, perhaps it could be considered productive.

It will, after all, produce a great deal of delusional fantasies in the girls’ minds.

“No! Definitely not! We’re all about Boys Love, and one of them is a girl now, so that’s just plain het!”

“Not so fast! We can’t jump to that conclusion so quickly! After all, there is such a thing as ships that are BL in spirit.”

“In spirit or not, they’re physically a man and a woman!”

“Well, I ship it! No matter what anyone says, I believe it counts!”

The place is in an uproar.

Two sides form, one for and one against the ship, neither willing to concede the point.

What are they arguing about, exactly? Well, the question is whether they can accept the pairing of one Shunsuke Yamada (♂) and Kanata Ooshima (formerly ♂, now ♀).

That is, from the perspective of fujoshi, fans of male-male romance.

And so the debate deepens.

Of the eight girls present, three are for the ship, three are against it, one is neutral, and one has yet to make her allegiance known.

The two sides are evenly matched.

Which means whoever can win over the neutral party wins.

“Asaka, you’re against it, too, right?”

“No, I’m sure she ships it!”

Both sides naturally begin to plead their case to the neutral party, Asaka Kushitani, attempting to coax her over to their side.

“Sorry. I don’t really understand any of this stuff.”

In stark contrast to the fiery passion of both sides trying to court her favor, Asaka’s expression is decidedly blank.

How did it come to this? she wonders.

When did her class become a pack of feral fujoshi?

She certainly doesn’t remember anything like this in their old lives.

They had never brought up such blatantly thirsty conversation topics before.

Yet now that they were reunited in their new lives, this was the state of things?

What in the world happened to bring them to this point?

“Hang on! Why wouldn’t Yamada be the bottom? Even with Ooshima in a girl’s body, it just makes more sense that way!”

“What?! Excuse me, I can’t let such nonsense slide! It’s gotta be Yamada/Ooshima, not Ooshima/Yamada!”

The fujoshi group gets even more heated about who would be the bottom and who would be the top.

Asaka still isn’t sure what any of this meant.

“Quiet!”

Kudo silences the room with a single word.

Asaka stares at her with narrowed eyes and raised eyebrows.

She has good reason to take such an attitude.

After all, Kudo herself was the one who started all this mess.

Not just the day’s discussion—she was the culprit who transformed all the girls here into BL-hungry fujoshi.

The truth was, Kudo had been a secret fujoshi in her previous life, too.

It was only in this life that she put that fully out in the open, passionately devoted herself to converting the others, and rose to the top of this fujoshi association.

Yes, Kudo was behind it all.

“……”

Kudo crosses her arms and stands in silence.

The other girls all watch her with bated breath.

To them, Kudo is essentially the founder of their religion.

Their leader, the one with the most experience walking the fujoshi path.

Thus far, it was tied, with three for the ship and three against it.

The neutral party, Asaka, hadn’t chosen a side. Or rather, she couldn’t.

Which meant that it was Kudo’s opinion that would decide which side was the victor.

So what would Kudo’s ultimate verdict be?!

“Sorry. I’m really only into 2D.”

A shocking rejection of the whole affair!

Kudo wasn’t interested in the real world, which some nerds call 3D.

It was fictional BL books that first grabbed Kudo’s attention.

That was back in Japan, where such things could be found in endless supply.

In the end, she still just considered it a hobby; she was able to separate fiction from reality.

Meanwhile, the girls who she’d awoken to this path were stuck in the elf village, with no access to any such books.

All they had to project their fantasies onto was their real-life former classmates—the reincarnation boys—or the elf guards whose names they didn’t even know.

So it was already a stretch from the beginning.

Even though she was their leader…

The room fell silent.

In the end, the meeting was adjourned without ever deciding the fate of the ship between Yamada and Ooshima.

ONE DAY IN THE ELF VILLAGE

Sunlight filters through the trees, gently illuminating the path as the boys walk.

They carry buckets of water in each hand.

“Ugggh, it’s such a pain doing this every day. Wish the well was a little closer.”

“It’d be even easier if we could use Water Magic or something. Y’know, just make it rain like BLOOSH!”

“I dunno. I feel like that’d be exhausting, too…”

“Nah, I know what you mean.”

Judging by their lively chatter, the boys don’t seem as put-upon as they claim.

Since they’ve been doing this every morning for so long, their muscles have grown stronger, and their bodies have gotten used to the load.

Eventually, they reach the end of the woods and emerge into a wide-open space.

A farmland, with vegetables planted at regular intervals.

The boys split up and begin scattering the contents of their buckets over the crops in the field.

It never rains in the elf village.

The barrier that covers the entire area keeps out the rain as well.

According to the elves, the reason that their forest remains lush nonetheless is an underground water vein that provides the forest with plenty of moisture.

They also say that a pure power residing in the earth here gives the plants life.

Truth be told, the vegetables would still grow even if they weren’t watered like this.

But the boys continue watering them anyway because they grow better that way.

Giving them water allows them to grow bigger and be harvested more quickly than if they were left to grow on their own.

There can be no compromise when it comes to providing nutrients for eleven growing girls and boys.

As the boys water the crops, they also pull up weeds.

The blessing of the forest affects weeds as much as any other plant.

If left unchecked, the weeds could take over the entire field in the course of a single day.

So they gather up all the weeds thoroughly and put them in the now-empty buckets.

Next, the boys head to the barn.

“Morning, guys.”

Two of the girls are already inside, taking care of the animals.

The stable is home to multiple kinds of livestock.

Some are raised for meat and have grown so fat that they look almost completely spherical when viewed from the side.

Others lay eggs, like the ones that look like a cross between a chicken and a reptile. Still others provide milk, creatures with thick furry coats.

The meat, eggs, and other byproducts of this livestock provide crucial animal protein, while the fur and hides are used to make food.

“Here ya go.”

The boys give the weeds they gathered and excess plants they culled to the livestock.

The herbivorous creatures slowly gather around and begin to eat.

Once the feeding is finished, the reincarnations gather at the dining hall.

Before they enter, they wash their hands in a water vessel provided at the door for that purpose.

“Morniiing.”

In the dining hall, the kitchen team has already finished making breakfast and is in the middle of setting the table.

Once that’s done, it’s time to eat.

Naan-like bread made from a boiled potato-like substance.

Soup loaded with vegetables.

Sunny-side up eggs garnished with a bit of dried meat.

And yogurt, or something like it.

The menu rarely changes from day to day.

They only ever have the same ingredients to work with, after all.

“Thanks for the food.”

Once the class president signals the start of the meal and everyone repeats the phrase, they begin to eat.

“Man, I miss soy sauce.”

“We’ve been over this, remember? Worcestershire sauce is the best for fried eggs.”

“Either way, we don’t have any.”

They chat amongst themselves as they finish up breakfast.

Salt is just about the only seasoning that they can get from the elves.

Touko Segawa’s power provides them with plenty of sugar, at least.

But other than that, they can’t get anything more exciting unless the elves give it to them on a whim.

They’ve tried to re-create other condiments with their vague memories from Earth, but since the ingredients here are all different anyway, it didn’t go very well.

Even with close approximations, including potato-like tubers and soy-like beans, they’re still just that—approximations.

It’s not just the more complicated processes like making soy sauce. Something relatively simple, like mayonnaise, still comes out as something else entirely because the ingredients aren’t quite the same.

Since they do have enough food supplies that they don’t have to worry about running out, they use spare ingredients to experiment whenever they can. In the short term, however, it hasn’t yielded any results.

“That was delicious.”

Another signal from the class president ends the meal.

The kitchen team immediately gets to work washing the dishes.

The boys go back into the forest to get water for daily use.

Once that’s done, they’re mainly put to work doing manual labor.

There are seven girls and only four boys.

By majority rule, that means the boys sadly have very little say.

They’re always worked to the bone.

Still, it’s not as if they’re actually being bossed around or oppressed. There’s equal division of labor, and they’re all just helping each other.

The girls aren’t playing around while the boys work. They clean, do laundry, and take care of other important tasks.

They’ve all known each other for a long time, including their previous lives.

Thus, their sense of solidarity has become quite strong.

“Clean the dung out of the barn, please.”

“We’re running low on firewood, too.”

“Ah! Can you gather up some branches while you’re at it, please?”

“And if you see anything that might work as feed for the livestock…”

The boys: “S-sure…”

…They’re counting on us! Not bossing us around!

That’s the silent mantra the boys tell themselves to soothe their souls.

But little do they know…

A quiet war is taking place among the girls behind the scenes.

A fierce competition over the boys themselves!

There are seven girls here.

And only four boys.

Yes, the girls outnumber the boys, making the latter a limited resource.

None of them knows how long their lives might go on like this, but for all they know, they could be confined in the elf village until they die.

In which case, the girls’ options for a spouse are very limited indeed.

What about the elves?

The girls want nothing to do with those stuck-up bastards who are keeping them trapped here.

What about the BL?

That’s a separate matter entirely.

It’s only natural that they would want to get closer to someone they already trust.

But if the boys and girls paired off, that would leave three girls alone.

Forever alone!

So in order to avoid that fate, the girls have been vying with each other over the four open seats, casually trying to close the distance between them and the boys.

The “casual” part is key; if one of them is too forward, the other girls will complain.

Why? Because the girls don’t want to ruin the current balance and make things cold and awkward amongst members of the group, either.

It’s one thing if two people naturally end up getting close and developing a relationship, but if somebody tries to make a grab for one of the boys, the result will be a bloodbath as the girls fight tooth and nail over the boys.

Thus, the unspoken rule is that the girls keep their flirting to a minimum and hope that one of the boys will confess their love of their own accord.

The boys: “Ooof! I just got the chills for some reason!”

No, they have no idea.

That if any one of them just works up the nerve to confess, they could easily get a girlfriend.

Although odds are that they’d be signing up to get pushed around even more.